Dad n Lef

My Dad & the LEF ( part2)

My Dad & the LEF ( part2)
 We c
ame  know, and as babes we were hooked in this net, and we were never given  achance to learn from other churches or other Christians. Its a closed and secret group which had high profile but inside its rotten and destroyed many.

           Only those really took the word and learned from other messages like Back to the Bible or good biographies were sustained till now, But those who were only this LEF .Because we were taught that we were the  only people who were holy and reach heaven , so we had an attitude of “Holier -than- thou -art”  in all spheres of life. We were strictly forbidden to be associated with any one who left LEF and went to another churches.And it was our bound duty to bring them back to LEF and in case these people are of our own household, we will be excommunicated stealthily. It means we were not given any responsibility in the church, We were supposed to serve the Lord, but when we were not given any responsibility how to serve was the question. Because only the work they give we have to do, not any other work for the Lord. If we do we will be publicly humiliated on the pulpit. and one day or the other day we will be asked to stand on the pulpit and confess that we did wrong thing by serving God which was not entrusted by the preachers of LEF.

So what are the works given by them to us?– Preaching in small branches of the LEF, which are far from the main church,  travelling with our own expenses ,or we will not be allowed to take offering moving in the lines of the congregation, or some times we will be questioned too for the daring act of taking communion in LEF, we will be called aside and scolded by them for taking the communion without having good example of the whole family be coming to LEF> Also we will never be called to cook for the servants of God if we were already doing that. So all of us used to feel humiliation for being excommunicated like this.  In case if any one in the family especially mother or father , or brother or sister were coming and then stopped to come to LEF< we were strictly given instructions not to be associated with them any more. we should not go our parents house, nor would we allow them to come to our house. We should not talk to them or help them any way. Even when we go we have to keep our distance to them, should not accept any gifts from them or should not stay with them for not more than one or two days. Till they come back to LEF we have to continuously talk to them in every given occasion. They are very knack to get all the information about our family matters and personal matters. They have many fox like spies to do that , also they were experts in spreading rumours too. Suppose we were taking some Sunday school, or active in youth meetings, or witnessing, we will be called aside and tell us not to take any more of these works because we were going to our parents houses . In fact they did not take the glass of water I offered once to them. haShe asked for a glass of water , so I gave it to her, because I was there at that time, but she did not accept it, and told me keep it on the table.

I thought I will be burnt in her sharp looks.
All these things were taught by the leaders of LEF, even Ruth and Jacob because they were having direct access with the high command in HQ we used to take every word of them as Law.
Excommunication, was like the AK47 Rifle in their hands, wherever KP directs Jacobs shoot at it. Therefore we were like lambs in front of them and shivered to the core.

Now Jacobs left the LEF  and they invited me and my husband, and offered to sit in chairs, which was a strange thing to me, because we were expected to sit on the floor or on the mat in front of these self styled Leaders, not only them any one LEF , if they preach , right from HQ to the least of the churches, no one is supposed to sit equal to them, they are expected to sit their feet, or kneel at the feet.  so after hearing all that nonsense from Jacob I aksed a straight question, ” you told us to obey the preachers and do whatever they told us, and now how can you ask us not to obey them?
for this query he was wrathful, and shouted, ” how dare you are to question me, ? what do you know ?”
I came out of that room, my husband was shocked to see the way the preacher lost his control and for the way he shouted at me.
Therefore with this sort of foolish mind and foolish religious attitude I went to Vizag to intercede my dad to come back to LEF>
And another important fear is, if we leave LEF we will get all sorts of diseases, any disease you get.. instead of praying for us they will point out all our follies and kill us with words, they would say because you did this or that you got this disease,  They used to threaten us that we will die suddenly, by accident or something.  They used to preach on the dias with so many examples, from the scriptures as well as from their own interpretation of church members who did not obey them. So even if we get a little head ache we were afraid to the core wondering whether we got any negative idea about the preachers.

On the other hand Obedience is the big weapon in their hand, we have to obey the preachers, whatever it is, if they ask us to leave the job we have to, most of the time they used to ask us to leave the job, out of sheer jealously, or to take revenge on us or to oppress us.  We should never speak either yes or no , we need to do just what they told us to do,  if we say any thing else we will be stamped as proud people or lairs,  If we do not listen to their instructions in our personal lives they would excommunicate us.  It means not only taking away those roles in LEF but also they would not visit our houses, when were are in any trouble, They would not pray for us, they would not ask for our welfare, or they would not select grooms and brides for our children. We and our children would be looked down. In case we chose any outside marriage alliance with other people in other church, they will tell every one that we have no faith and we are disobedient people and tell the congregation not to go to such marriages, not to take wedding cards too.  In case any one was dare enough to come to our such marriages, such person will be excommunicated for a while after much rebukes and scoldings. some times in front of every one.
There was a woman who was an expert in setting up marriage alliances, the bride or groom will be manipulated in such a way they could not go from the enticing words of this woman. So arranging marriages was a lure to the members of this LEF,  This LEF used to tell us there was no caste in it, and we believed it and lived it in our lives. But they think of some castes very high, so any boy or girl from such castes come to know of the Lord, they will be elevated and good marriage alliances will arranged for them.  Other wise these leaders had nice fun in arranging mis match marriage alliances, like a black and stout and fatty man will be given a fair and beautiful girl,  or tall and thin girl will be given a short and stout man as groom, or sometimes highly educated girl will be given a man as her husband who was just 2nd class or a coolie of the agriculture fields, some times two people were joined in marriage who does not know the language of the other,  Thus arranging these matches the one who arranged will have great fun and frolic  and oppress them by telling them that they should obey him or her.

Especially if these girls or boys work for them in their homes, taking care of their children, cleaning bathing, them, and cooking and doing all errands of work in their houses they will get a boy or girl to marry. Rich girls and rich boys need not wait till they attained 35 years, if the girl or boy is 35 and poor they will be told that they should wait some more years like Isaac  till 20 years to get marry. Funny They have to clean their vessels plates they ate,  and do every dirty work in their homes, they do not pay any thing to them .
Then only they will get marry.

                   The preachers in LEF used to shiver to see these leaders, and stand in front of them in attention, hours together,sometimes they used to massage their bodies too. hahah.. But thank God we both were doing our own jobs and never depend on them for our livelihood on the other hand we were publicly accountable and used to read the accounts just like in any Lutheran churches.

another great weapon in their hands was May Retreat.  This is yet another terrible story, which I will depict in detail in next episode.  In its name these leaders used to kill great evangelists, by making them to work in hot sun, or not providing proper food, and getting free labour in their gardens and fields and constructions.   WAIT FOR NEXT EPISODE (part 3)
 God brings us to a nook where we hate ourselves and understand that no one but God is our refuge, and Redeemer. I was traveling a journey which I never intended to do, but I was there very much , lived in it, past cannot be changed, or rectified, knowing this very well I write these episodes , hoping that my stupidity of doing things would prevent some lonely sincere soul could realized the truth and withdraw his/her feet from those misty paths of confusion which I trod upon and lost many precious moments with my beloved dad…. read… this episode with open mind, as a person from outside… you will understand more than i wrote.. you will read between the lines.. and colors of the lines….

Jesus specifically told us, “Do what they told you, but do not do what they do”  – -But we often forget about this important instruction and do the opposite.  We do what they are doing but do not do what they told us.—Sad,
They preach the best , they preach from the Word of God, if they do not preach from the word of God, we certainly do not go to them to listen, so the Devil puts the word of God in their mouth, so that we will listen to them  get good impression of them, but we forget what they taught on the pulpit, but interested only in what they do.
Thus the trick of satan works successfully in our lives, and those who preach and those who listen but do what they do also perish.  Got it??

That’s exactly happens in many churches especially in our LEF too.  But some of us took literally what they told us, even off the pulpit, in extreme way, iota to iota, sometimes,  and ruined in those areas;  we are able to discern  in many ways and came out of those traps, means, its only because of God’s grace, and also the inner desire to do the will of God which they told us to do, was a plus point in our spiritual growth.

Whatever  they taught to do the Will of God all the time , from the very beginning of our contact with the LEF< They tell us that God talks to us,  how blessing it would had been if only we do just what they told us, but how many times we just forget about this important instruction but wait for their instruction instead !!!   So who has to blame?  Certainly I blame myself hundred per cent hundred.    In most of the life decisions, like my job, marriage, children, house, prayer place etc, I sought the Will of God and it did not put me shame. But some other mundane things, of life I depend on them , and there found myself put to shame and useless state.

One other thing is, these people preach us to do the Will of God , but they play God many a times, they rub their will upon us saying its good for us, with regard to marriages, resigning jobs, shifting houses, cut off with the relatives, not one nor two, any number of things can be intruded by these wonderful godly looking people, and we will be thrown into endless pitches forever and ever to be burnt.   Some times in many cases, if those persons do not listen to their instructions, they will excommunicate the person not to cook for the congregation in the meetings, or send them to preach in the branches of lef, or they are not allowed to teach sunday school children, nor allowed to give witness to the youth, nor speak to other brothers or sisters in LEF>
Therefore, we have to be live on thorny path all the time, trembling, shivering, every minute of life.. depending on them, at the same time killing our own wishes or plans for life. Be aware !! is caution hung on our necks. Beware of dogs!!! nooo Beware of LEF leaders. and preachers, dear folks!!!

Such were the days wherein we were entangled into their traps, nets, and mouse traps, but strange we were feeling that ours is the best devotion, best life, best worship, best prayer, just like the Pharasees, We are the Holier than any one else in the Christendom!! we we, we are the only one in the whole world!! How blind we were, how stupid we were and how much we were cheated by the Evil one!!

We used to tell every one that ” Our LEF  have depth, no one has that, come and join us, to be saved and reach God, you do not get this depth any where else”   –Those were the beginning days of my separation from LEF, I was too confused by the ways outside LEF, but in heart of hearts I knew that I made the right decision by being separated from LEF   at this juncture one of my old acquaintances came to my home , we both were talking something about our other things, but suddenly she asked me , why ” Akka, why people in LEF feel that their church is the only church which is the best of all?”
I found the only answer I could tell her, so I told her, with as faded smile,’ They say that its only church which have depth”
She exclaimed and laughed aloud, “What?!!! Depth?/ you mean, the depth like in  a pit? An endless depth  so that never could come out of it?? HHAAAhaa ”  we both had a hearty laughter realizing the funny word depth with regard to LEF>

In these circumstance I went to see my dad and mom. My dad all ready got heart attack due to enormous stress caused by LEF on him.  But all of us, me and my sisters and mom were insisting that he should come back to LEF then he will be healed, In other words we were telling him that he got heart attack because he left LEF> This we did not tell him directly but with many other incidents happened to other people who left LEF.  and when those people returned the heart attack was healed.
My dad retired as DSP in the Police Department, There were 5 battalions of Reserve Police constables and 5 Reserve Police officers worning under him.  He was powerful Police Officer, after knowing Christ personally, he repented for all the bribes he took in his career, so not able to find out all those people to return that money, he sold some fertile land in E. G. Dt and gave it to jacobs to buy a place for the church in Vizayanagaram in Phool Bhag.    Next he was accustomed to all sorts of vices but the Lord delivered him all that past life in a miraculous way.
so retirement of a police officer is not like the retirement of other jobs like mine , Lecturer!!  soon after he layed down his office he came to home along with other two constables,  they saluted him in attention( lastly) and went off.  my dad sat in the sofa, I knelt down at his feet and helped him to relieve his office shoes, and helped him to take away his Office khaki uniform and the belt and hat etc.  It means he would never put them again in life !! there was sort of sorrow in the room.  in his eyes, in his face. in every one of us. We were accustomed to see dad going to march fast every morning at 4 am, momused to get up and give cup of hot coffee at 3:30 am every day, all through these years. The constable used to come and help dad to put on his uniform and shoes for the march every morning at 3:35 am every day.   He used to leave the home with a Lathi ( Police stick ) to the office. This is regualar thing happened since 1952 till he retired in 1985.  but because he was not coming to LEF none of us were interested to give a party to him. My husband as usual went to mid week prayer meeting  without giving a least importance to his retirement.  My dad was alone and alone !! He asked us to come to photo studio to have a photo of family on that last day, but my husband did not turn up.  and that last photo was  sans my husband whom my dad considered as his beloved son, and only son.

Dad was so very sad.  I too made him suffer with my looks, my pride, my self-righteousness, my religion, my association with LEF made to look down at him.
Dad loved me more than any one, he was so considerate of me, any thing he brought he used to say’ first Leela, let her choose for herself first”   He used to call me and wanted to talk to me now and then, in those days we did not have phones, so he used to call me on the phone of neighbour, when I got phone I used to shiver , and I used to run to the phone at once, and when I heard his voice, then I would say, with relief” humm, its you nanna garu, thank God!!  why I was shivering so much because I was so afraid, whether I would hear an evil news that my dad met an accident and died, or he got terrible illhealth and joined hospital again etc. Because we were brainwashed that those who leave lef will meet  accidents and die.  Once my brother in law had a fall on road on new scooter, because he was new to ride the scooter. But we were told out right, because he is with your dad all ways he met this accident, because he is helpinng your dad to get his bag this happend. .  My younger sister was a premature baby, she used to be very weak in childhood, I used to spend hours together at her bed in kakindad whenver she fell asick, not knowing what to do, I used to give her my company while she was struggle to breath.   So her first baby boy while in delivary died , soon after this the lef started to blame her and her husband and me for keeping her in the same apartment built  for three of us. as three floors.  So immediatly in fear like Lot from Sodom and Gomarrah left the house then and there for rented house leaving all those rooms empty. My two sisters were in Vizag but they were not allowed to stay with my dad in the same building though there were three floors seperately for each one of us.
Once they ordered me to leave the job then and there. After the deat of my husband they started to oppress me to sell my home only home, telling me” you cannot maintain this big house so better you sell it to us and go away to an apartment” I once casually talked to man who came to my home ,saying after the demise of my husband I found no interest in anything and it became very difficult to stay in the house.  Instead of giving me a support or encouragement that I should be brave enough to do so he went and reported to the person who usurped me from LEF administration and he happilily wanted to get rid of me from the near by premises and started to push eaders to bring pressure on me to sell. When  I rejected he managed to build a Baptistry opposite to my back gate through which we made a way to enter into the center all those years.
Thee are the people who try to devour the houses of the widows seeing their plight and weakness.   They told me that it is not good for me to have gold , and better I give them away to the ministry. they indirectly instructed me better i should go in pale colors to college. They told me that my children should not study computers and threatend me that those who study computers will get strange diseases. Also told me to sell th sccoter which was bought by husband just a few months back , because none of us should use it other wise we will meeet accidents..So I sold it. I oobeyed them literally in all these matters.  They said I should not have a car, never .  so I sold the 5 day new brand car. for 50000 less cost for which I bought.

But one Day God talked to me surprisingly, and to the point, that I have another work and another field to serve Him.. ( will be continued in next episode)

MONDAY, MAY 25, 2015

MY DAD AND LEF (Part 1)

  THIS IS HEART WRENCHING TRUE EPISODE, SERIES 1…
YOU WILL SEE THE TRUE COLOR OF LEF, AND HOW FAR IT COULD RUIN THE LIVES AND FAMILIES WITH ITS CUNNING SMILE OF DECEIT AND with its DESIRE OF MAMMON’S LAUGHTER..
. THE PROBLEM WITH THIS CHURCH IS, IT PRETENDS THAT ITS THE ONLY CHURCH WHO IS FAR ABOVE ALL OTHERS,
BUT IN FACT ITS WORSE THAN MANY OTHERS,
BECAUSE OF ITS HAUGHTY GAIT, AND PRESUMPTIOUS ARROWS TO KILL THE INNOCENT.
. BEWARE FRIENDS NEVER YIELD TO IT AND WASTE YOUR LIVES AS WE DID….   
     1992-93 academic year completed very smoothly, as my husband was transferred to Eluru in a miraculous way by the mighty hand of God. April was the end of the academic year.  we had summer holidays from then on. Shajaan , a final year student of mine was leaving for Vizayanagaram, beyond Vizag. So I asked my husband can I travel with her in the same Simhadhri train as she would be a help for me in my journey with my little children to see my Dad and mom. Surprisingly he had his consent without any other word of objection.       Here I need to tell about my dear father, and also about the church I was going in those days.  It was called LEF ( Laymen’s Evangelical Fellowship)  Because some times we become so stupid and blind and simpletons and very foolish thinking that what we exercise as devotion to God would ruin our lives and we would never have a chance to correct ourselves for what we did in that foolishness. These circumstances would be so horrible that even when we want to correct them those would be beyond our capacity and would never be possible to do so. In that proecess we not only hurt ourselves but we hurt those whom we really so much in our lives . We felt that we were doing good to them but in fact we were ruining them by going against the word of God. I confess this that I did in that same way thinking that I was serving God.
 Of course I was such a foolish one, self righteous, presumptuous, and proud person but in the heart of heart I certainly believed that I was following God and doing only His will. I trusted Him that I was in His will. May be that was the reason God also ignored to  left me alone, He was just indifferent in those days about my foolishness.
Now I see that God in His wonderful wisdom and endurance just bore with me as He was with Abraham or Paul leaving them to do whatever they wanted to do till the day they were confronted by Him in strange ways.
In every body life if they really love God sometimes the foolishness prevails in the lives of such people will be tolerated by God to bring good in them because of His majestic love for such soul. He did not forsake me.    I want to tell you in more detailed manner, Look at the orthodox heathen people they worship the creation leaving the creator, like they call paper money as goddess, they call paper which were invented by man as another goddess, they worship fire, water, and air, and earth, They believe it with all their mind and soul, never they doubt that they have been cheated by their own self, They forgot the Creator of the world, but the love of God so vast He would not bring destruction upon them , He just endures everything and very slowly He deals with them to woo them , to show them His eternal love. Just because He was tolerant of them does not mean what they were doing was right,  the deeds were all together wrong but God was looking at their motive, their desire to reach God so the Soveriegn God just tolerates them until they come to Him. Even in their darkness He tries to reach them and to reveal Himself.  He would consider their darkness and the deeds of darkness as the way to reach Him. One of them was Paravasthu Suryanarayana, God revealed Himself to this Hindu priest in the sanctuary of the Idol temple in Poori Jagannadhaswami temple. He was an expert in Vedas, the Hindu philosophy, very orthodox priest , proud man but as he was reading the Hindu scriptures God revealed Himself through those very scriptures and delivered him from the clutches of caste and idol worship. Jesus Christ Himself went into the sanctuary of Idol Temple and where this man was , and talked to him.
So was Sadhu Sundar Singh a Sikh boy who hated Bible and Christians so very much but very fond of his Hindu vedas,  He burnt theBible with kerosen and wanted to commit suicide if God whom he was praying that was krishna would not come and reveal himself to him that night. But Krishna did not come to him but Christ Himself came to that boy that night.
God was looking at the motive of people not their foolish ways and means , to reach Him. If the motive was true to the core, He would not hesitate to come down to reveal to such people like those above I mentioned.
So was with the case of Saul who learnt the philosophy  of Jews at the feet of Gamalalia,  believed his mission to kill Christians was good in the sight of God, and when he was about to fulfill that mission of killing all Christians, because he thought it was God’s work he was about to do. God saw the desire in his heart to serve God, though his means was quiet wrong, So He himself respected the inner desire of saul and met him on the road to Damscus and changed his life from Saul to Paul. 
God’s ways are mysterious, no one can tell His ways in terms of black and white design, to understand Him a little even requires a  lot of suffering on the part of man. Without suffering and experience  with God, people can never come to understand other human beings. The man who accepted the murder of Stephen , the man who was terror to Christians , turned up into the most influential person of Christendom later. Most of the epistles in the Bible were written by him. God loved this man even when was going in the wrong way because his heart’s motive was good in the sight of God. That is seeking the God, serving the God.

For some years I too was like that, I was with full of self righteousness, presumption, and religious maniac, blind spiritually, I was thinking that I was right even then. I did not leave the presence of God,
I prayed for the salvation of my dad since the very first day I accepted Christ, in tears, I prayed for him, I loved him so much, i led him in the way of salvation, but later I started to hate him, I left him I caused a lot of pain for him but still God in His Sovereign love and endurance accepted me even when my dad and His disciple had to undergo a lot of suffering, just like Stephen of the old.
       I am trying my level best to explain these things in simpler form, but even them I found my words and flow of language is insufficient to read you to explain everything I did undergone in those days, in detail. Because that agony, that repentance, that suffering In my heart is too hard to explain in words.
 Because I was so foolish in those days, now I am able understand people who are sailing in the same boat of mine which was a past in my life. It is helping me to love them and to guide them properly. When I see them travelling that wrong path I walked upon, I plead for them in tears, and understand them in tears, I pray for them in tears.

My dad was a courageous Police officer. Brave , disciplined and intelligent and very valiant in his attitude and deeds. Though born in a village, , in those days, he went all the way to Malabar to get trained as a Police officer under British discipline, got job in Madras and lived like a lion.  He learned all those bad habits of police officers of those days, his roaring voice was his plus point, his height and weight brought him to the highest realms of his career, he had social drinking, had to use vulgar language to deal with the bandicoots of the anti social elements, and also lived as he likes.
  after I received Christ as my personal Saviour, and after I repented of my life and got the assurance of salvation, the first person for whom i started to pray with burden was my father.  So thought it took a number of years for him to come to the Lord, as usual he was honest and sincere in his seeking the lord, and he too repented and set right things with God and man and got the assurance of salvation and then took baptism and turned up from a lion life to a humble sheep in his word and deeds. He left all those old wild vices, and we had a very peaceful and joyful home with the love of God and truthfulness of God. We were bound together, in His love and fear of God reigns over us. Then some terrible thing happened in our family.
I started to listen to the word of God first in LEF so I led my mom, dad, and sisters, and all my relatives to this church wherever they were. I used to introduce them to the church leaders, or pastors and entrust them to them .  That is how I entrusted my dad to Br. Jacob and Sis Ruth , in Vizayanagaram and Vishakapatnam. where they were incharge of LEF in both places. They loved my dad for his guiless qualities, and called him Nathaniel and led him to the Lord to be baptised too..
But there arised some misunderstandings or misgivings between this couple and the leaders of HQ. They realized the HQ is not in the right path of God , as it was founded in the beginning, this happened in the year 1982. As a result this couple which was staunch believers in LEF and stawlwarts of the foundations of LEF left it then and there. But they had given the reason of their decision to my dad and some other important people in the church. They told them how LEF HQ including JD and KP are of having double standars  and how they were cheating people, Edward Rajaratnam and William Rajaratnam the first cousines of JD were in Vizag at that time. They too affirmed the misdoings of JD and KP and they too left LEF> So dad as he had much experience of people behavious, and as wise man he supported jacobs and left LEF and started to attend the church they started.
But for us , we were taught that LEF Is the only true church, in this alone there is real and truthful leading for the salvation of the souls, This is light, so any body left this Light means they are going into the dark, and they become darkness. We were taught that we never should listen to the word of God any where else. We were told if we listen to any other people we will be possessed by evil spirits. Jacobs echoed the voice of LEF to us.  We were not supposed to invite any other pastor of any other church.. we were taught that we should keep this attitude always, i.e., They should turn up towards us, and we never should turn towards others. Because there are pastures in LEF the real sheep of Jesus need not go any other pastures for the food.  I f they go they will be destroyed and die. They often told us there is depth in LEF which is not found any where in any other church. Because all other churches give only decietful word and they only cheat us, So we dare not to go to any other church even our christian friends invite us. We never mix with other Christians. EVen in our work place or any other place when we met other Christians , we used to maintain an attitude of sympathy for them like” Poor people these people’s Christianity is so poor, and we were trying to bring them to our LEF by hook or crook 
WILL BE CONTINUED TOMORROW……… WAIT.

ame  kn
ow, and as babes we were hooked in this net, and we were never given  achance to learn from other churches or other Christians. Its a closed and secret group which had high profile but inside its rotten and destroyed many. 
           Only those really took the word and learned from other messages like Back to the Bible or good biographies were sustained till now, But those who were only this LEF .Because we were taught that we were the  only people who were holy and reach heaven , so we had an attitude of “Holier -than- thou -art”  in all spheres of life. We were strictly forbidden to be associated with any one who left LEF and went to another churches.And it was our bound duty to bring them back to LEF and in case these people are of our own household, we will be excommunicated stealthily. It means we were not given any responsibility in the church, We were supposed to serve the Lord, but when we were not given any responsibility how to serve was the question. Because only the work they give we have to do, not any other work for the Lord. If we do we will be publicly humiliated on the pulpit. and one day or the other day we will be asked to stand on the pulpit and confess that we did wrong thing by serving God which was not entrusted by the preachers of LEF.

                  So what are the works given by them to us?– Preaching in small branches of the LEF, which are far from the main church,  travelling with our own expenses ,or we will not be allowed to take offering moving in the lines of the congregation, or some times we will be questioned too for the daring act of taking communion in LEF, we will be called aside and scolded by them for taking the communion without having good example of the whole family be coming to LEF> Also we will never be called to cook for the servants of God if we were already doing that. So all of us used to feel humiliation for being excommunicated like this.  In case if any one in the family especially mother or father , or brother or sister were coming and then stopped to come to LEF< we were strictly given instructions not to be associated with them any more. we should not go our parents house, nor would we allow them to come to our house. We should not talk to them or help them any way. Even when we go we have to keep our distance to them, should not accept any gifts from them or should not stay with them for not more than one or two days. Till they come back to LEF we have to continuously talk to them in every given occasion. They are very knack to get all the information about our family matters and personal matters. They have many fox like spies to do that , also they were experts in spreading rumours too. Suppose we were taking some Sunday school, or active in youth meetings, or witnessing, we will be called aside and tell us not to take any more of these works because we were going to our parents houses . In fact they did not take the glass of water I offered once to them. haShe asked for a glass of water , so I gave it to her, because I was there at that time, but she did not accept it, and told me keep it on the table.

I thought I will be burnt in her sharp looks.
All these things were taught by the leaders of LEF, even Ruth and Jacob because they were having direct access with the high command in HQ we used to take every word of them as Law.
Excommunication, was like the AK47 Rifle in their hands, wherever KP directs Jacobs shoot at it. Therefore we were like lambs in front of them and shivered to the core.

      Now Jacobs left the LEF  and they invited me and my husband, and offered to sit in chairs, which was a strange thing to me, because we were expected to sit on the floor or on the mat in front of these self styled Leaders, not only them any one LEF , if they preach , right from HQ to the least of the churches, no one is supposed to sit equal to them, they are expected to sit their feet, or kneel at the feet.  so after hearing all that nonsense from Jacob I aksed a straight question, ” you told us to obey the preachers and do whatever they told us, and now how can you ask us not to obey them?
 for this query he was wrathful, and shouted, ” how dare you are to question me, ? what do you know ?”
I came out of that room, my husband was shocked to see the way the preacher lost his control and for the way he shouted at me.
Therefore with this sort of foolish mind and foolish religious attitude I went to Vizag to intercede my dad to come back to LEF>
                And another important fear is, if we leave LEF we will get all sorts of diseases, any disease you get.. instead of praying for us they will point out all our follies and kill us with words, they would say because you did this or that you got this disease,  They used to threaten us that we will die suddenly, by accident or something.  They used to preach on the dias with so many examples, from the scriptures as well as from their own interpretation of church members who did not obey them. So even if we get a little head ache we were afraid to the core wondering whether we got any negative idea about the preachers.

         On the other hand Obedience is the big weapon in their hand, we have to obey the preachers, whatever it is, if they ask us to leave the job we have to, most of the time they used to ask us to leave the job, out of sheer jealously, or to take revenge on us or to oppress us.  We should never speak either yes or no , we need to do just what they told us to do,  if we say any thing else we will be stamped as proud people or lairs,  If we do not listen to their instructions in our personal lives they would excommunicate us.  It means not only taking away those roles in LEF but also they would not visit our houses, when were are in any trouble, They would not pray for us, they would not ask for our welfare, or they would not select grooms and brides for our children. We and our children would be looked down. In case we chose any outside marriage alliance with other people in other church, they will tell every one that we have no faith and we are disobedient people and tell the congregation not to go to such marriages, not to take wedding cards too.  In case any one was dare enough to come to our such marriages, such person will be excommunicated for a while after much rebukes and scoldings. some times in front of every one. 
There was a woman who was an expert in setting up marriage alliances, the bride or groom will be manipulated in such a way they could not go from the enticing words of this woman. So arranging marriages was a lure to the members of this LEF,  This LEF used to tell us there was no caste in it, and we believed it and lived it in our lives. But they think of some castes very high, so any boy or girl from such castes come to know of the Lord, they will be elevated and good marriage alliances will arranged for them.  Other wise these leaders had nice fun in arranging mis match marriage alliances, like a black and stout and fatty man will be given a fair and beautiful girl,  or tall and thin girl will be given a short and stout man as groom, or sometimes highly educated girl will be given a man as her husband who was just 2nd class or a coolie of the agriculture fields, some times two people were joined in marriage who does not know the language of the other,  Thus arranging these matches the one who arranged will have great fun and frolic  and oppress them by telling them that they should obey him or her.

            Especially if these girls or boys work for them in their homes, taking care of their children, cleaning bathing, them, and cooking and doing all errands of work in their houses they will get a boy or girl to marry. Rich girls and rich boys need not wait till they attained 35 years, if the girl or boy is 35 and poor they will be told that they should wait some more years like Isaac  till 20 years to get marry. Funny They have to clean their vessels plates they ate,  and do every dirty work in their homes, they do not pay any thing to them .
Then only they will get marry.

                   The preachers in LEF used to shiver to see these leaders, and stand in front of them in attention, hours together,sometimes they used to massage their bodies too. hahah.. But thank God we both were doing our own jobs and never depend on them for our livelihood on the other hand we were publicly accountable and used to read the accounts just like in any Lutheran churches.

another great weapon in their hands was May Retreat.  This is yet another terrible story, which I will depict in detail in next episode.  In its name these leaders used to kill great evangelists, by making them to work in hot sun, or not providing proper food, and getting free labour in their gardens and fields and constructions.   WAIT FOR NEXT EPISODE (part 3)

      Fear fear Fear thine is the name of LEF. people shiver and tremble and kneel in front of the leaders, In the name of obedience the will of man is killed and brutally murdered, and chopped into pieces, and leave them as zombies to work and toil in BG. The rules and regulations are for the working class, if you want to understand what I am saying read ANIMAL FARM of Goerge Orwell , do nor miss this book, if you miss to read that, you are at loss.. lol

        I must write about the May Retreats, I started to go to these May Retreats from 1974 on wards, till 2005  . These retreats were for those who have committed their lives to the Lord and they were meant for the growth of spiritual life with a taste of poverty to sustain ourselves in real world when we would expose to such poverty in our lives.  It was to understand the poor amongst us. This was the spirit behind in my longing to go there every year after year.  we had minimum food and lodging facilities and lot of word of God and testimonies, it was rich spiritual atmosphere.. we were thrilled to get know the God’s loving people in one place for ten days, we had plenty of time to sit alone and pray under the green trees.
The food was of a table spoon of Upma and black water coffee with jaggary,  and lunch coarse rice and dal  and severing most of the days we were on fasting and praying, the rooms were thatched sheds to keep our belongings, so with primitive facilities we had for ten days, me and my family were well equipped with enough training to face any sort of life in real world. Every one rich or poor we lived and shared the life just the same there atleast for just 10 days.

                  But later I saw the place was changed from the first taste of life there, there were differentiation among the comers, with regard to boarding and lodging.  no time to pray… all was like a maya bazaar.
so I stopped to go to witness the mimicry of evangelists and many dramas of evil minded.
       Later when BG was purchased the king of the place ordered all people to come serve and labour there without pay.  All evangelists were expected to work there for a few months, in hot sun.  no food no rest,

              Even the diabetics were expected to work from morning to evening, and that caused heart attacks to some of them after they returned, this was exactly what happened in our home to loose the head of the family.

            Then why were we going in there which was started with good intentions but later ruined the very nature of the retreat?

              It is God who called us to work for Him, it is His love that makes us to work for Him, but we were brainwashed completely that we had to work only in LEF but no where else. The bondage was such that we were tied by the satan to the man made rules of LEF. we were blind, we were in fancy utopia of being used by God only in LEF; We dared not to leave LEF never we dared to entertain such thoughts in our lives. which were considered as grave sin.

   
                  So if were not in the good looks of the HQ we were not allowed to go to May retreat, Once my dad came to retreat, on my request, I wanted him to see and listen to the word of God,  but one famous evangelist from  found my dad in the retreat, and complained to HQ ladies,  they called me and scolded me left and right and told me to go away from the retreat, I was crying in the heart, I brought my dad with the permission of jacobs, with a desire to spend time in prayer with him where there were no other distractions, actually my dad would never come to any place he was an officer, and we used to obey him all the time, this time he obeyed me and God to set right his life. When this thing happened, strangely I was low in spirit but did not get any anger, on the other hand I thought we were not deserved to be in this ‘holy place’—never a thought aroused in me to retort back, so we shifted to some friends house which was too far and I brought my dad every day to the retreat.
It was heart wrenching experience, humiliated and weeping in the souls.

             They used to give punishment by stopping people to come to retreat, one day I was there when the Lady of the HQ was asking her bosom friend,  “Hey…( her name) what type of punishment we will give to this man?  I looked at the man, he was poor evangelist from one of the places in Andhrapradesh…. and that wicked lady giggled and said, ” what else akka, its simple, we will not allow this man to come to retreat” Both were giggling to their hearts’ content and the man was like a leaf in the storm shivering.   It means if he is not allowed to retreat means, his congregation will come to know of this, and they will look down at him and he will not have chance to proceed with his service to the Lord in his center, if the LEF banner is not there he would not be considered as an evangelist, all his sheep will leave him…  this was the cunning plot of these HQ women.

               I too was shivered at that moment, seeing me there, the Leader barked at me,
” Why you are here Leela? go and stand in distance..”  Tears were welling up in my eyes, never these two women would allow me to live my life.She was the one asked me to come to esquire certain things, and now asking me and yelling at me!!!

          But strangely enough I did not entertain one negative thought against them but meekly stepped aside.    We knew how these people are manipulating the people in LEF, they are partial and most wicked minded to oppress the whole congregation. They never allowed me to be near them, though I loved them so much just because they were the leaders of HQ.

   Gone those days of useless futile dusty memories.
   
           Once the HQ lady was barking at Jacobs, in the retreat, it was the last one they attended,  she was yelling at them,” How dare you come to the retreat ,you did not pray for the retreat, nor you announced in the church to pray for the retreat. How can u come to this place,”

             He was professor,  highly educated, but he and his wife were standing there  while she was seated on a high chair while she was yelling at them.   I saw it with my own eyes, and heard it.There is a way how to talk to others, and how to confront others, no one is their slave!!
           But strangely enough we were brainwashed not to entertain any negative thought … like the animals in the Animal Farm George Orwell allegory.
               Some how I was never in their good looks, though I look like I was associating with these people very much.  They never share anything with me, they never call me or talk to me freely. May be because  I was listening to them very obediently , and nod my head for everything they told me, but I used to attach a tag saying, “I too will pray, and will find out the will of God in this regard”

This saved my life from much disaster which was faced by many innocent souls in LEF.

                    But in this case, because of my father my eyes were   blinded  because we both , me and my husband were in the crux of LEF in charge evangelists, and we could not go our own way lest we will be teared into pieces and even in Christ is victor our names will be published saying we were disobedient to them.
   
       Fear, Fear,  only fear.. there was no place for love.

          Here in LEF every body call the leader of LEF as PROPHET;    equalizing him to the prophets of Old Testament.  If we oppose him or thought negatively in our minds, we will be ruined, this was an unwritten rule amongst us. Of course the leader never said that he was the prophet, but people attributed this to his personality, and almost worship him.

                I do not know how it emerged, but still it is there and my relatives say so.. with a sheepish grin on their faces. I look at them.. with pain in my eyes and rebuke them.. therefore they never visit me or help me in my problems. Every one has had this fear, so we purposefully closed our eyes, and ears, and mouth, and kept quiet.  He should be the only one mouth speaker in LEF, even his mother was not allowed to give TV speaches or his kith and kin, The Christ is victor magazine gives the name his only and none others,  they ‘select” from other preachers and write anonymously…. why they do so?  if people read the names they too listen to those messages or read those messages and leave LEF??   These people work as HOLY SPIRIT;   what i mean , all the work that has to be done by Holy Spirit will be done by the crew of LEF preachers.  –No body should write own songs, or sing own songs or prepare own cassettes or cds  they should not write any articles or books, If they do so, they will be burnt under the wrath of the head, that is the Prophet.                                                            
            If they do it, they will be excommunicated. or ruthlessly murdered by the words on the pulpit of Stuvartpuram or Revival meetings or in May retreat .
                   Now coming to Tithes of the members of LEF; by the by there is no membership or recognition of any member in this group.  These people look like they do not ask money on the pulpit.  Once upon a time they were really clean .. but as the days go by, they started to boast on the pulpit that they do not ask for money, that they do not have bank accounts, and they do not touch even one rupee note, no purse with them etc etc.. But they give long speeches about the giving of tithes , and that these should be given only in the church they attend that is LEF;  as it is true church.
             
                  I am docile one , i did not understand this till recently, i knew that they were speaking superlatives of their money dealings, because I am the witness of their greed directly.    but did not understand how it can be possible to live without a bank account.

                          Recently my friend Leena told me the secret behind these words. in her own words,  the story goes like this”  Akka, I have gone to the shopping along with my colleagues,  I purchased some and used my credit card to pay them. But this friend of mine paid by cash, she bought diamonds and lot of gold. I said why you carry money like that, better u have ATM card, for that she laughed and said, ‘Leena I do not have money in the bank or do I have credit cards, ” I was shocked and I asked her, ” What , what are you saying Leena?” She laughed loudly, and said Poor akka , you are innocent, see these people do not keep money in the banks, because most of the money they have is black money, they do not pay tax , if they keep it in the bank they have to pay tax , you see, so they carry money in their inside pockets of their dresses… hahah”
                 Then my dull head started to work out. So these preachers speak that they do not have bank account means they have black money, recently one lady, preacher’s wife on the stage said this,” I do not have bank account” she is working woman and spends lavishly on flowers to decorate her hair and spend money on costly sarees, and says no account… wah.. poor ignorant people and dumb people and stupid people like me believe them.
             When this leader was telling us that he prepares his own coffee in usa , we opened out mouths and looked at him sympathetically… because we could not imagine the prophet boiling the coffee… and when he told us that he could not lift his suitcases in the airport so he rolls them on the ground, we felt pity, and I thought if only I am a man I would have worked as a servant to this prophet to lift his suitcases… haha  not knowing any one in the airport when the sutuit case is too haveay we have to roll it on the ground..  its not a big deal at all, because the coolies are not available in airports.;  when he told us only his wife had to take him in car, we were all in tears.. not knowing in america all women drive  and they were the ones who do all the work in home do shopping and take care of children  and it is shared by the couple as and when it is needed, his wife used to tell us, ” see the ground on usa is quivering, it may fall apart any time, there is no safety for you or for your family, ‘ do not come to usa,  she was giving the preaching, and I was the most stupid one to translate this stupid message in stuvartpuram.    in 2000.   But still they are there, thought the ground is opening its mouth.

              Dear christain folks do not be cheated by all this sort of nonsense. There are so many tricks to cheat you.   ((continued in next episode.)

  • Excellent. All LEF “members” and “ex-members” should read this
  •  
    Andrew Immanuel I didn’t realise murdering from the pulpit was common.to JD. He did that to me and his daughter did that using FB.
    Thanks for explaining why some don’t have bank accounts! BTW, JD always said I didn’t take a penny from LEF. He was careful not to say rupee!
    May 31 at 6:38am · Unlike · 2Well said, Aunty. Your reference to May retreat as Mayabazar is quite apt. In t
    • Of course either jubilee garu or whoever they were made to play the tune of hq. 
      All of us were puppets. 
      Some of us like jubilees escaped this maya in right time. But like them or me all of us were prone to do certain things which we never intended to those. Like these acts of oppression on poor souls like my dad in the beginning of his repentance. 
      I like ur direct and transperancy of speaking all ways rather sneaking back
    •  
      Leelavathi Malaka Wait for the next episodes… how my dad and my family were illtreated… without any reason. U will be in tears bec i wrote those lines in tears flowing unceasingly… though my dad my dear died in 1992 still the wound is fresh bec i treated him worse than jubilee garu or HQ…
  • hat Maya bazar, some are rule makers who hardly show their actual colors as the people who are commissioned to implement the rules are often seen as villains in LEF. Your reference to the evangelist from Hyd complaining set me thinking. It is unbelievable how LEF sets stage for two unrelated people to become bitter enemies even though neither one of them has anything against the other. I can imagine poor Jubilee uncle trying to do the “Gurkha” job he was assigned to do and here you are may be after 30-40 years still being hurt about it. While in that Maya bazaar, we never realized who was the hero and who was the villain. I personally sometimes wish that someone gives me a list of all the wrongs I may have done to people while thinking that I was carrying out the “Godly work” commissioned by these LEF Demi Gods. People who at any point in their lives were in LEF can see the “Maya” in LEF only after coming out of it. I guess God needs to show double the grace to LEF people- first grace to save them from sin and the second grace to save them from LEF…

      Fear fear Fear thine is the name of LEF. people shiver and tremble and kneel in front of the leaders, In the name of obedience the will of man is killed and brutally murdered, and chopped into pieces, and leave them as zombies to work and toil in BG. The rules and regulations are for the working class, if you want to understand what I am saying read ANIMAL FARM of Goerge Orwell , do nor miss this book, if you miss to read that, you are at loss.. lol

        I must write about the May Retreats, I started to go to these May Retreats from 1974 on wards, till 2005  . These retreats were for those who have committed their lives to the Lord and they were meant for the growth of spiritual life with a taste of poverty to sustain ourselves in real world when we would expose to such poverty in our lives.  It was to understand the poor amongst us. This was the spirit behind in my longing to go there every year after year.  we had minimum food and lodging facilities and lot of word of God and testimonies, it was rich spiritual atmosphere.. we were thrilled to get know the God’s loving people in one place for ten days, we had plenty of time to sit alone and pray under the green trees.
The food was of a table spoon of Upma and black water coffee with jaggary,  and lunch coarse rice and dal  and severing most of the days we were on fasting and praying, the rooms were thatched sheds to keep our belongings, so with primitive facilities we had for ten days, me and my family were well equipped with enough training to face any sort of life in real world. Every one rich or poor we lived and shared the life just the same there atleast for just 10 days.

                  But later I saw the place was changed from the first taste of life there, there were differentiation among the comers, with regard to boarding and lodging.  no time to pray… all was like a maya bazaar.
so I stopped to go to witness the mimicry of evangelists and many dramas of evil minded.
       Later when BG was purchased the king of the place ordered all people to come serve and labour there without pay.  All evangelists were expected to work there for a few months, in hot sun.  no food no rest,

              Even the diabetics were expected to work from morning to evening, and that caused heart attacks to some of them after they returned, this was exactly what happened in our home to loose the head of the family.

            Then why were we going in there which was started with good intentions but later ruined the very nature of the retreat?

              It is God who called us to work for Him, it is His love that makes us to work for Him, but we were brainwashed completely that we had to work only in LEF but no where else. The bondage was such that we were tied by the satan to the man made rules of LEF. we were blind, we were in fancy utopia of being used by God only in LEF; We dared not to leave LEF never we dared to entertain such thoughts in our lives. which were considered as grave sin.

   
                  So if were not in the good looks of the HQ we were not allowed to go to May retreat, Once my dad came to retreat, on my request, I wanted him to see and listen to the word of God,  but one famous evangelist from  found my dad in the retreat, and complained to HQ ladies,  they called me and scolded me left and right and told me to go away from the retreat, I was crying in the heart, I brought my dad with the permission of jacobs, with a desire to spend time in prayer with him where there were no other distractions, actually my dad would never come to any place he was an officer, and we used to obey him all the time, this time he obeyed me and God to set right his life. When this thing happened, strangely I was low in spirit but did not get any anger, on the other hand I thought we were not deserved to be in this ‘holy place’—never a thought aroused in me to retort back, so we shifted to some friends house which was too far and I brought my dad every day to the retreat.
It was heart wrenching experience, humiliated and weeping in the souls.

             They used to give punishment by stopping people to come to retreat, one day I was there when the Lady of the HQ was asking her bosom friend,  “Hey…( her name) what type of punishment we will give to this man?  I looked at the man, he was poor evangelist from one of the places in Andhrapradesh…. and that wicked lady giggled and said, ” what else akka, its simple, we will not allow this man to come to retreat” Both were giggling to their hearts’ content and the man was like a leaf in the storm shivering.   It means if he is not allowed to retreat means, his congregation will come to know of this, and they will look down at him and he will not have chance to proceed with his service to the Lord in his center, if the LEF banner is not there he would not be considered as an evangelist, all his sheep will leave him…  this was the cunning plot of these HQ women.

               I too was shivered at that moment, seeing me there, the Leader barked at me,
” Why you are here Leela? go and stand in distance..”  Tears were welling up in my eyes, never these two women would allow me to live my life.She was the one asked me to come to esquire certain things, and now asking me and yelling at me!!!

          But strangely enough I did not entertain one negative thought against them but meekly stepped aside.    We knew how these people are manipulating the people in LEF, they are partial and most wicked minded to oppress the whole congregation. They never allowed me to be near them, though I loved them so much just because they were the leaders of HQ.

   Gone those days of useless futile dusty memories.
   
           Once the HQ lady was barking at Jacobs, in the retreat, it was the last one they attended,  she was yelling at them,” How dare you come to the retreat ,you did not pray for the retreat, nor you announced in the church to pray for the retreat. How can u come to this place,”

             He was professor,  highly educated, but he and his wife were standing there  while she was seated on a high chair while she was yelling at them.   I saw it with my own eyes, and heard it.There is a way how to talk to others, and how to confront others, no one is their slave!!
           But strangely enough we were brainwashed not to entertain any negative thought … like the animals in the Animal Farm George Orwell allegory.
               Some how I was never in their good looks, though I look like I was associating with these people very much.  They never share anything with me, they never call me or talk to me freely. May be because  I was listening to them very obediently , and nod my head for everything they told me, but I used to attach a tag saying, “I too will pray, and will find out the will of God in this regard”

This saved my life from much disaster which was faced by many innocent souls in LEF.

                    But in this case, because of my father my eyes were   blinded  because we both , me and my husband were in the crux of LEF in charge evangelists, and we could not go our own way lest we will be teared into pieces and even in Christ is victor our names will be published saying we were disobedient to them.
   
       Fear, Fear,  only fear.. there was no place for love.

          Here in LEF every body call the leader of LEF as PROPHET;    equalizing him to the prophets of Old Testament.  If we oppose him or thought negatively in our minds, we will be ruined, this was an unwritten rule amongst us. Of course the leader never said that he was the prophet, but people attributed this to his personality, and almost worship him.

                I do not know how it emerged, but still it is there and my relatives say so.. with a sheepish grin on their faces. I look at them.. with pain in my eyes and rebuke them.. therefore they never visit me or help me in my problems. Every one has had this fear, so we purposefully closed our eyes, and ears, and mouth, and kept quiet.  He should be the only one mouth speaker in LEF, even his mother was not allowed to give TV speaches or his kith and kin, The Christ is victor magazine gives the name his only and none others,  they ‘select” from other preachers and write anonymously…. why they do so?  if people read the names they too listen to those messages or read those messages and leave LEF??   These people work as HOLY SPIRIT;   what i mean , all the work that has to be done by Holy Spirit will be done by the crew of LEF preachers.  –No body should write own songs, or sing own songs or prepare own cassettes or cds  they should not write any articles or books, If they do so, they will be burnt under the wrath of the head, that is the Prophet.                                                            
            If they do it, they will be excommunicated. or ruthlessly murdered by the words on the pulpit of Stuvartpuram or Revival meetings or in May retreat .
                   Now coming to Tithes of the members of LEF; by the by there is no membership or recognition of any member in this group.  These people look like they do not ask money on the pulpit.  Once upon a time they were really clean .. but as the days go by, they started to boast on the pulpit that they do not ask for money, that they do not have bank accounts, and they do not touch even one rupee note, no purse with them etc etc.. But they give long speeches about the giving of tithes , and that these should be given only in the church they attend that is LEF;  as it is true church.
             
                  I am docile one , i did not understand this till recently, i knew that they were speaking superlatives of their money dealings, because I am the witness of their greed directly.    but did not understand how it can be possible to live without a bank account.

                          Recently my friend Leena told me the secret behind these words. in her own words,  the story goes like this”  Akka, I have gone to the shopping along with my colleagues,  I purchased some and used my credit card to pay them. But this friend of mine paid by cash, she bought diamonds and lot of gold. I said why you carry money like that, better u have ATM card, for that she laughed and said, ‘Leena I do not have money in the bank or do I have credit cards, ” I was shocked and I asked her, ” What , what are you saying Leena?” She laughed loudly, and said Poor akka , you are innocent, see these people do not keep money in the banks, because most of the money they have is black money, they do not pay tax , if they keep it in the bank they have to pay tax , you see, so they carry money in their inside pockets of their dresses… hahah”
                 Then my dull head started to work out. So these preachers speak that they do not have bank account means they have black money, recently one lady, preacher’s wife on the stage said this,” I do not have bank account” she is working woman and spends lavishly on flowers to decorate her hair and spend money on costly sarees, and says no account… wah.. poor ignorant people and dumb people and stupid people like me believe them.
             When this leader was telling us that he prepares his own coffee in usa , we opened out mouths and looked at him sympathetically… because we could not imagine the prophet boiling the coffee… and when he told us that he could not lift his suitcases in the airport so he rolls them on the ground, we felt pity, and I thought if only I am a man I would have worked as a servant to this prophet to lift his suitcases… haha  not knowing any one in the airport when the sutuit case is too haveay we have to roll it on the ground..  its not a big deal at all, because the coolies are not available in airports.;  when he told us only his wife had to take him in car, we were all in tears.. not knowing in america all women drive  and they were the ones who do all the work in home do shopping and take care of children  and it is shared by the couple as and when it is needed, his wife used to tell us, ” see the ground on usa is quivering, it may fall apart any time, there is no safety for you or for your family, ‘ do not come to usa,  she was giving the preaching, and I was the most stupid one to translate this stupid message in stuvartpuram.    in 2000.   But still they are there, thought the ground is opening its mouth.

              Dear christain folks do not be cheated by all this sort of nonsense. There are so many tricks to cheat you.   ((continued in next episode.)

  • Excellent. All LEF “members” and “ex-members” should read this
  •  
    Andrew Immanuel I didn’t realise murdering from the pulpit was common.to JD. He did that to me and his daughter did that using FB.
    Thanks for explaining why some don’t have bank accounts! BTW, JD always said I didn’t take a penny from LEF. He was careful not to say rupee!
    May 31 at 6:38am · Unlike · 2Well said, Aunty. Your reference to May retreat as Mayabazar is quite apt. In t
    • Of course either jubilee garu or whoever they were made to play the tune of hq. 
      All of us were puppets. 
      Some of us like jubilees escaped this maya in right time. But like them or me all of us were prone to do certain things which we never intended to those. Like these acts of oppression on poor souls like my dad in the beginning of his repentance. 
      I like ur direct and transperancy of speaking all ways rather sneaking back
    •  
      Leelavathi Malaka Wait for the next episodes… how my dad and my family were illtreated… without any reason. U will be in tears bec i wrote those lines in tears flowing unceasingly… though my dad my dear died in 1992 still the wound is fresh bec i treated him worse than jubilee garu or HQ…
  • hat Maya bazar, some are rule makers who hardly show their actual colors as the people who are commissioned to implement the rules are often seen as villains in LEF. Your reference to the evangelist from Hyd complaining set me thinking. It is unbelievable how LEF sets stage for two unrelated people to become bitter enemies even though neither one of them has anything against the other. I can imagine poor Jubilee uncle trying to do the “Gurkha” job he was assigned to do and here you are may be after 30-40 years still being hurt about it. While in that Maya bazaar, we never realized who was the hero and who was the villain. I personally sometimes wish that someone gives me a list of all the wrongs I may have done to people while thinking that I was carrying out the “Godly work” commissioned by these LEF Demi Gods. People who at any point in their lives were in LEF can see the “Maya” in LEF only after coming out of it. I guess God needs to show double the grace to LEF people- first grace to save them from sin and the second grace to save them from LEF…   God brings us to a nook where we hate ourselves and understand that no one but God is our refuge, and Redeemer. I was traveling a journey which I never intended to do, but I was there very much , lived in it, past cannot be changed, or rectified, knowing this very well I write these episodes , hoping that my stupidity of doing things would prevent some lonely sincere soul could realized the truth and withdraw his/her feet from those misty paths of confusion which I trod upon and lost many precious moments with my beloved dad…. read… this episode with open mind, as a person from outside… you will understand more than i wrote.. you will read between the lines.. and colors of the lines…. 

         Jesus specifically told us, “Do what they told you, but do not do what they do”  – -But we often forget about this important instruction and do the opposite.  We do what they are doing but do not do what they told us.—Sad,
                They preach the best , they preach from the Word of God, if they do not preach from the word of God, we certainly do not go to them to listen, so the Devil puts the word of God in their mouth, so that we will listen to them  get good impression of them, but we forget what they taught on the pulpit, but interested only in what they do.
            Thus the trick of satan works successfully in our lives, and those who preach and those who listen but do what they do also perish.  Got it??
                 That’s exactly happens in many churches especially in our LEF too.  But some of us took literally what they told us, even off the pulpit, in extreme way, iota to iota, sometimes,  and ruined in those areas;  we are able to discern  in many ways and came out of those traps, means, its only because of God’s grace, and also the inner desire to do the will of God which they told us to do, was a plus point in our spiritual growth.
                  Whatever  they taught to do the Will of God all the time , from the very beginning of our contact with the LEF< They tell us that God talks to us,  how blessing it would had been if only we do just what they told us, but how many times we just forget about this important instruction but wait for their instruction instead !!!   So who has to blame?  Certainly I blame myself hundred per cent hundred.    In most of the life decisions, like my job, marriage, children, house, prayer place etc, I sought the Will of God and it did not put me shame. But some other mundane things, of life I depend on them , and there found myself put to shame and useless state.
          One other thing is, these people preach us to do the Will of God , but they play God many a times, they rub their will upon us saying its good for us, with regard to marriages, resigning jobs, shifting houses, cut off with the relatives, not one nor two, any number of things can be intruded by these wonderful godly looking people, and we will be thrown into endless pitches forever and ever to be burnt.   Some times in many cases, if those persons do not listen to their instructions, they will excommunicate the person not to cook for the congregation in the meetings, or send them to preach in the branches of lef, or they are not allowed to teach sunday school children, nor allowed to give witness to the youth, nor speak to other brothers or sisters in LEF>
         Therefore, we have to be live on thorny path all the time, trembling, shivering, every minute of life.. depending on them, at the same time killing our own wishes or plans for life. Be aware !! is caution hung on our necks. Beware of dogs!!! nooo Beware of LEF leaders. and preachers, dear folks!!!
        Such were the days wherein we were entangled into their traps, nets, and mouse traps, but strange we were feeling that ours is the best devotion, best life, best worship, best prayer, just like the Pharasees, We are the Holier than any one else in the Christendom!! we we, we are the only one in the whole world!! How blind we were, how stupid we were and how much we were cheated by the Evil one!!
        We used to tell every one that ” Our LEF  have depth, no one has that, come and join us, to be saved and reach God, you do not get this depth any where else”   –Those were the beginning days of my separation from LEF, I was too confused by the ways outside LEF, but in heart of hearts I knew that I made the right decision by being separated from LEF   at this juncture one of my old acquaintances came to my home , we both were talking something about our other things, but suddenly she asked me , why ” Akka, why people in LEF feel that their church is the only church which is the best of all?”
    I found the only answer I could tell her, so I told her, with as faded smile,’ They say that its only church which have depth”
    She exclaimed and laughed aloud, “What?!!! Depth?/ you mean, the depth like in  a pit? An endless depth  so that never could come out of it?? HHAAAhaa ”  we both had a hearty laughter realizing the funny word depth with regard to LEF>
           In these circumstance I went to see my dad and mom. My dad all ready got heart attack due to enormous stress caused by LEF on him.  But all of us, me and my sisters and mom were insisting that he should come back to LEF then he will be healed, In other words we were telling him that he got heart attack because he left LEF> This we did not tell him directly but with many other incidents happened to other people who left LEF.  and when those people returned the heart attack was healed.
          My dad retired as DSP in the Police Department, There were 5 battalions of Reserve Police constables and 5 Reserve Police officers worning under him.  He was powerful Police Officer, after knowing Christ personally, he repented for all the bribes he took in his career, so not able to find out all those people to return that money, he sold some fertile land in E. G. Dt and gave it to jacobs to buy a place for the church in Vizayanagaram in Phool Bhag.    Next he was accustomed to all sorts of vices but the Lord delivered him all that past life in a miraculous way.
    so retirement of a police officer is not like the retirement of other jobs like mine , Lecturer!!  soon after he layed down his office he came to home along with other two constables,  they saluted him in attention( lastly) and went off.  my dad sat in the sofa, I knelt down at his feet and helped him to relieve his office shoes, and helped him to take away his Office khaki uniform and the belt and hat etc.  It means he would never put them again in life !! there was sort of sorrow in the room.  in his eyes, in his face. in every one of us. We were accustomed to see dad going to march fast every morning at 4 am, momused to get up and give cup of hot coffee at 3:30 am every day, all through these years. The constable used to come and help dad to put on his uniform and shoes for the march every morning at 3:35 am every day.   He used to leave the home with a Lathi ( Police stick ) to the office. This is regualar thing happened since 1952 till he retired in 1985.  but because he was not coming to LEF none of us were interested to give a party to him. My husband as usual went to mid week prayer meeting  without giving a least importance to his retirement.  My dad was alone and alone !! He asked us to come to photo studio to have a photo of family on that last day, but my husband did not turn up.  and that last photo was  sans my husband whom my dad considered as his beloved son, and only son.

    Dad was so very sad.  I too made him suffer with my looks, my pride, my self-righteousness, my religion, my association with LEF made to look down at him.

    Dad loved me more than any one, he was so considerate of me, any thing he brought he used to say’ first Leela, let her choose for herself first”   He used to call me and wanted to talk to me now and then, in those days we did not have phones, so he used to call me on the phone of neighbour, when I got phone I used to shiver , and I used to run to the phone at once, and when I heard his voice, then I would say, with relief” humm, its you nanna garu, thank God!!  why I was shivering so much because I was so afraid, whether I would hear an evil news that my dad met an accident and died, or he got terrible illhealth and joined hospital again etc. Because we were brainwashed that those who leave lef will meet  accidents and die.  Once my brother in law had a fall on road on new scooter, because he was new to ride the scooter. But we were told out right, because he is with your dad all ways he met this accident, because he is helpinng your dad to get his bag this happend. .  My younger sister was a premature baby, she used to be very weak in childhood, I used to spend hours together at her bed in kakindad whenver she fell asick, not knowing what to do, I used to give her my company while she was struggle to breath.   So her first baby boy while in delivary died , soon after this the lef started to blame her and her husband and me for keeping her in the same apartment built  for three of us. as three floors.  So immediatly in fear like Lot from Sodom and Gomarrah left the house then and there for rented house leaving all those rooms empty. My two sisters were in Vizag but they were not allowed to stay with my dad in the same building though there were three floors seperately for each one of us.
      Once they ordered me to leave the job then and there. After the deat of my husband they started to oppress me to sell my home only home, telling me” you cannot maintain this big house so better you sell it to us and go away to an apartment” I once casually talked to man who came to my home ,saying after the demise of my husband I found no interest in anything and it became very difficult to stay in the house.  Instead of giving me a support or encouragement that I should be brave enough to do so he went and reported to the person who usurped me from LEF administration and he happilily wanted to get rid of me from the near by premises and started to push eaders to bring pressure on me to sell. When  I rejected he managed to build a Baptistry opposite to my back gate through which we made a way to enter into the center all those years.
    Thee are the people who try to devour the houses of the widows seeing their plight and weakness.   They told me that it is not good for me to have gold , and better I give them away to the ministry. they indirectly instructed me better i should go in pale colors to college. They told me that my children should not study computers and threatend me that those who study computers will get strange diseases. Also told me to sell th sccoter which was bought by husband just a few months back , because none of us should use it other wise we will meeet accidents..So I sold it. I oobeyed them literally in all these matters.  They said I should not have a car, never .  so I sold the 5 day new brand car. for 50000 less cost for which I bought.
    But one Day God talked to me surprisingly, and to the point, that I have another work and another field to serve Him.. ( will be continued in next episode)
    Answered prayers strengthen us and helps us to proceed in life with more fervor to the Lord, and with deepened love for Him and  more  gratitude in heart to serve Him.  If this is not the result of those answered prayers, we will be puffed up and become selfish and useless in course of time. 
    I am recording the answered prayers here in this place to encourage others to wait upon His answeres and to act upon them, which will never put us to shame.

    Since 1973 I was accustomed to write a small dairy like book , apart from my regular journal, of everyday walk with God. This little book of palm size had two columns on each page.  The columns headings were as  ” I ASKED GOD’   — HE ANSWERED”. So when I sit in the presence of Lord, I was clear what to ask Him and also was very clear that I have to ask Him persistently till I get the answer from Him.  Therefore it was my wont , that I wait for the answer and record both my prayer and answer with dates, in those columns.  
          After I got married, both my husband and myself entered our prayer requests in that little book and wait upon the Lord for answers and registered those answers there.
          After his demise I was asked to take care of the LEF center for 3 consecutive years , I was taking care of supervising the administration, extension of the church premises, taking care of the needs of people, entrusting different works to different brothers according their capacity and sending money to HQ every month by counting the money by two brothers in the church etc.  The regular revival meetings, children retreats were keeping on going as before. I was not preaching on sundays, which I never did or would, but the things were going on just like as it was when my husband was with me. I used to refere his dairy for guidelines of church work. and instruct the same to the few helpers in the ministry.  It went on allmost till 2003,
    Suddenly a new pastor was posted in that place without my knowledge, this man was a sunday school boy for me once upon a time when we were working in other place.  So when he came told me I was happy to have a son like pastor in that place, I believed he would have the same respect for me to take guidance in church work as he was given pastorship first time in this place. In fact i was a little bit disappointed, and thought if only an elderly couple with much more experience and knowledge might have come to this place so that I can be under their wings and carry on the work as it was before. But this man newly married and came and started to behave in different way, which I never believed it would be so. Completely ignored me, and started to behave indifferently, the people started to behave weirdly, fearing him , stopped to talk to me in his presence, stopped to come to me all together, I became just another a member in the church,  the most revered women’s meeting timings were changed without my notice, everything was in his hands , never have courtesy to inform me or seek advice from me, and he just started to behave as an usurper.The strange behaviour of this couple used to hurt me very much, one day I came home from church and sat in my chair while the tears were rolling down my cheeks… and I was praying and dozed to sleep for a minute , then I heard a voice , strong and firm in my head, ” SHAELTIEL” it was heard thrice, first time I heard it and jerked from the dozing , and again dozed and heard it twice again.  Immediatly I got up from the chair and got the Bible concordance to check up this word, I knew it was from the Bible but I was not acquited with any person of that name.  When I found the meaning of that word is ” I ASKED GOD’– I heard His still small voice… “You are writing a book called I ASKED GOD right?  Its the time for you to ask more, Ask of me I will give you, Ask for the ministry I will give, why you worry about this church and the ministry here? Ask”    Then and there I knelt down and asked God for the work to do for Him,  I was clearly led by Him that I need not stick to this LEF any more in ordered to serve Him in different fields,  a number of fields awaiting to minister.. First I must stop to go to LEF, then the Lord is going to show me where I have to work.”   I got up from my knees, not knowing what does He means .  I did not know any other church except LEF since my conversion to christianity, I never knew any persons in christianity.  But I was waiting for His answer. Days going by… I told the new pastor , that I am going to have memorial service of my husband, he objected for it, and contacted HQ immediatly and I got summons, that ‘it is not necessary to conduct the memorial service of my dead husband, its not desirable, he wrote to me that he was against all these memorial services, and in fact he did not want his own fathers’s memorial since a long, and now he is intended to stop it even.  and If  I insist that I should have I can have it in my little hall where only three or four people can be called and pray for an hour and disperse.” That was the letter I got in 2003,  I obeyed them literally. but they did not fulfill what they wrote in that letter, the memorial service of his father is going on even now to this year.  I told you they tell us morals but they never do them. I still do not know what was wrong with to conduct memorial service of the man of God who toiled for the church for 15 long years and almost laid down his life for that work . And exemplary pastor’s memorial service was objected by these people just because they were jelous of him and feared for their own fame and name, worried people would remember him again and thereby remember the sacrifice of the family and again love me. These and many other vested interests made them to cut my heart into pieces by stopping the memorial service of my husband.
    One of those days one boy who was turned up into  a pastor , came to my home and encouraged me to start a children magazine called,
    AMMA VODI ( in the lap of mother)  and encouraged me to give messages in TV channels.   With his encouragement I started to stand firm , and started to have my own ministry . This new usurper announce on the stage  telling people that they need not read any other magazine except lef magazines, he was afraid of my magazine that if people read it they will come to know of the facts and truth of LEF>But when I went to vizag I was still in LEF, and my husband was still alive, it was the year 1992 … my dad was waiting for me, as the train Simhadhri was a bit late, my dad was anxiously waiting on the steps of the first floor . I said,’ why nanna, garu, why you have to wait for me, any way I will come know…!”  he was happy for my arrival,  later I came to know he was supposed to join the hospital the previous day but he postponed it because I was coming home, he did told me later in the hospital.later when i joined him.
    I found he was breathless, when I inquired my mom, and sister, they told me, now and then he is like that only, but later he would be all right. Not knowing the gravity of the situation, though I was much worried about his health condition, I was cleaning his room, and washing his clothes etc while talking to him. He was looking at me and talking to me with much difficulty, I was uncomfortable about this situation, then one of his doctor friend came and told me this is urgent and i should take him to hospital. The previous night I was with my dad , he complained there was pain in his back, I rubbed the pain balm, but I never suspected any heart attack, my mom and sister and brother in law were telling me its normal , some times he feels so, so nothing to worry.  I was with my dad late in night, I was praying and singing the song about the blood of Jesus, slowly and massaging his back.  In the middle of the night, my mom came in and said, you traveled today , you look very tired go and sleep , I will be with dad, thus she sent me to my room. I knelt down to pray before retiring to bed, then I heard a voice , it was very clear again.” If you do not pray for your father now, there is no use to pray later”   I was shocked, I continued to pray for a long time for the soul of my dad, for his redemption , for his healing of body and mind.   when I went to bed i do not remember.

    My dad my dad, I was very cruel towards him, I did not show my love to him, I did not express my gratitude to him for all that he did for me, on the other hand I was condemning him,  I loved him, but I was supposed to not love him, nor show my respect to him, if I did , I am not a true LEFITE—–
    When the doctor told me to take my dad to hospital, KGH  i got an auto, put his clothes in small case i folded him into my right arm and took him to hospital at once,  on the way to hospital something happend,  I saw  big red letters in front of my eyes,  in telugu just for a second and disappeared, “There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ” …  Then I found myself telling me, {oh then there is no punishment to my dad, because he is in the Lord, though he is not in lef,) my heart at peace I admitted  him in the hospital, that was the  first time I ever saw the ECG reading, I was there with him, all through, the staff ware so indifferent, they never cared the patient,  I was there alone praying and waiting in the hospital  When I was in my 5th class I got measles, dad was all in all for me, he took care of me so much, he brought whatever I wanted to have, I still remember I asked him that I wanted to eat Kaajaalu, he brought white kaajalu which we used to call Kommulu, so I said I do not want them and I want only those brown ones, he at once got them for me.  He used to take me to the doctor on his bike and used to talk to the doctor .. When I got double typhoid in my 9th class, he was with me all the time, he used to bring the doctor John In Guntcareful about my diet and my bed. I remeber how you used to worry when I got cramps in my legs, and everyday he used to take me to the doctor in my BA days in kakinada, later I started to su

  • ur and was so ffer from terrible weakness and breathlessness, in Vizag, he was there to take me to different doctors and though it was beyond his capability he got the perfect treatment for me . When I got jaundice and about to die, in Vizayanagaram he was with me , took me to many doctors, he used to lift me with his hands so that I can be put in the zeep to go to the doctor.. .. he was such loving father, took care of me in tender way, Once I went to Vizag with whole body swollen he took me to doctor Chittipanthulu, stayed with me till I got healed and sent me home to Eluru.   How can I forget him , his tender care ,  now he was on bed, not able to move , the tears were rolling down .. I was following the instructions of the doctor meticulously.  They admitted  him in the hospital, by then my sisters mom and brothers in law all came to the hospital,  After he was joined in the ICU    I told them I will be with him till he is recovered,  because I want to take care of him. I have holidays, you have jobs to do. I want to serve him, no need to stay with him, i can take care of him.  Thus I sent them homes , I stayed with him day and night , I did not eat nor took care of myself, I was there for him in prayer and pleading for his soul day and night, one day suddenly I heard a voice, ” we have to go to him, he will not come to us” the words David spoke about his dead child to his servants.  I did not understand, but I understand that there it is , a death, my dad is going to die?  no no.. I knelt down and prayed bitterly crying for the soul of my dad… and for his healing,  I did not know how and why I started to pray like this. but I was led to pray by the Spirit.. like this” Lord, what about the soul of my dad, I am afraid , how do I know that he will come to You only, How do i know he reached you , not condemned?( i had fear if he die he may go to hell because he is not in lef)   the most stupidest of all, my brain was corrupted, i was brainwashed fool by the lef.
    But God in His mercy answered me” You will know he has come to me , by his peaceful death”
    I understood that in my own way, i thought he would not die by accident, but he will have natural death, even though he left lef, but never it occurred to me that he is going to die the next day.   I thought he would be healed and come home but die later after  awhile after many days, in peace.
    So the next days he was spic and span, got up from the bed, I was a stupid not to understand the reading of the echo machine, I was educated moron, I did not understand any thing that was going on there, as he got up from bed, I changed his dress, I gave good white dress and helped him to dress,  and I asked him the first and last time whether I could shave his grown up hair on face, and cleaned his  face brushed his teeth, and I too was very weary of fasting  I took his permission to go home and change my dress, and have a bath. I asked my brother in law to stay with my dad in my absence,  I took leave of him, he sent me with sorrowful eyes, he felt that he did not give any thing to me as he had given to my sisters . I said nothing to worry, and I never desired anything from him . those were the last words we spoke to each other.
    I left him and went home and made my sister and mom to go to hospital, and stay with dad till come .
    but by 12 noon, my brother in law came to fetch me to the hospital, on the way he informed me that my dad died.  my mom went and gave food to him,  and my both sisters with with him , then he asked forgiveness of my mom once again and laid down his head in her lap and died.
    I could not understand why I was not there with him in the last moment.  This question haunted me … till I shared this story to my principal Sr. Winifred in the college . after one month.
    We brought my dad home,
    NO ONE FROM LEF TURNED UP TO SEE MY DAD IN THE HOSPITAL OR TO HOME AFTER HIS DEATH.
    Yes NO ONE.

    God brings us to a nook where we hate ourselves and understand that no one but God is our refuge, and Redeemer. I was traveling a journey which I never intended to do, but I was there very much , lived in it, past cannot be changed, or rectified, knowing this very well I write these episodes , hoping that my stupidity of doing things would prevent some lonely sincere soul could realized the truth and withdraw his/her feet from those misty paths of confusion which I trod upon and lost many precious moments with my beloved dad…. read… this episode with open mind, as a person from outside… you will understand more than i wrote.. you will read between the lines.. and colors of the lines…. 

     Jesus specifically told us, “Do what they told you, but do not do what they do”  – -But we often forget about this important instruction and do the opposite.  We do what they are doing but do not do what they told us.—Sad,
            They preach the best , they preach from the Word of God, if they do not preach from the word of God, we certainly do not go to them to listen, so the Devil puts the word of God in their mouth, so that we will listen to them  get good impression of them, but we forget what they taught on the pulpit, but interested only in what they do.
        Thus the trick of satan works successfully in our lives, and those who preach and those who listen but do what they do also perish.  Got it??

             That’s exactly happens in many churches especially in our LEF too.  But some of us took literally what they told us, even off the pulpit, in extreme way, iota to iota, sometimes,  and ruined in those areas;  we are able to discern  in many ways and came out of those traps, means, its only because of God’s grace, and also the inner desire to do the will of God which they told us to do, was a plus point in our spiritual growth.

              Whatever  they taught to do the Will of God all the time , from the very beginning of our contact with the LEF< They tell us that God talks to us,  how blessing it would had been if only we do just what they told us, but how many times we just forget about this important instruction but wait for their instruction instead !!!   So who has to blame?  Certainly I blame myself hundred per cent hundred.    In most of the life decisions, like my job, marriage, children, house, prayer place etc, I sought the Will of God and it did not put me shame. But some other mundane things, of life I depend on them , and there found myself put to shame and useless state.

      One other thing is, these people preach us to do the Will of God , but they play God many a times, they rub their will upon us saying its good for us, with regard to marriages, resigning jobs, shifting houses, cut off with the relatives, not one nor two, any number of things can be intruded by these wonderful godly looking people, and we will be thrown into endless pitches forever and ever to be burnt.   Some times in many cases, if those persons do not listen to their instructions, they will excommunicate the person not to cook for the congregation in the meetings, or send them to preach in the branches of lef, or they are not allowed to teach sunday school children, nor allowed to give witness to the youth, nor speak to other brothers or sisters in LEF>
     Therefore, we have to be live on thorny path all the time, trembling, shivering, every minute of life.. depending on them, at the same time killing our own wishes or plans for life. Be aware !! is caution hung on our necks. Beware of dogs!!! nooo Beware of LEF leaders. and preachers, dear folks!!!

    Such were the days wherein we were entangled into their traps, nets, and mouse traps, but strange we were feeling that ours is the best devotion, best life, best worship, best prayer, just like the Pharasees, We are the Holier than any one else in the Christendom!! we we, we are the only one in the whole world!! How blind we were, how stupid we were and how much we were cheated by the Evil one!!

    We used to tell every one that ” Our LEF  have depth, no one has that, come and join us, to be saved and reach God, you do not get this depth any where else”   –Those were the beginning days of my separation from LEF, I was too confused by the ways outside LEF, but in heart of hearts I knew that I made the right decision by being separated from LEF   at this juncture one of my old acquaintances came to my home , we both were talking something about our other things, but suddenly she asked me , why ” Akka, why people in LEF feel that their church is the only church which is the best of all?”
I found the only answer I could tell her, so I told her, with as faded smile,’ They say that its only church which have depth”
She exclaimed and laughed aloud, “What?!!! Depth?/ you mean, the depth like in  a pit? An endless depth  so that never could come out of it?? HHAAAhaa ”  we both had a hearty laughter realizing the funny word depth with regard to LEF>

       In these circumstance I went to see my dad and mom. My dad all ready got heart attack due to enormous stress caused by LEF on him.  But all of us, me and my sisters and mom were insisting that he should come back to LEF then he will be healed, In other words we were telling him that he got heart attack because he left LEF> This we did not tell him directly but with many other incidents happened to other people who left LEF.  and when those people returned the heart attack was healed.
      My dad retired as DSP in the Police Department, There were 5 battalions of Reserve Police constables and 5 Reserve Police officers worning under him.  He was powerful Police Officer, after knowing Christ personally, he repented for all the bribes he took in his career, so not able to find out all those people to return that money, he sold some fertile land in E. G. Dt and gave it to jacobs to buy a place for the church in Vizayanagaram in Phool Bhag.    Next he was accustomed to all sorts of vices but the Lord delivered him all that past life in a miraculous way.
so retirement of a police officer is not like the retirement of other jobs like mine , Lecturer!!  soon after he layed down his office he came to home along with other two constables,  they saluted him in attention( lastly) and went off.  my dad sat in the sofa, I knelt down at his feet and helped him to relieve his office shoes, and helped him to take away his Office khaki uniform and the belt and hat etc.  It means he would never put them again in life !! there was sort of sorrow in the room.  in his eyes, in his face. in every one of us. We were accustomed to see dad going to march fast every morning at 4 am, momused to get up and give cup of hot coffee at 3:30 am every day, all through these years. The constable used to come and help dad to put on his uniform and shoes for the march every morning at 3:35 am every day.   He used to leave the home with a Lathi ( Police stick ) to the office. This is regualar thing happened since 1952 till he retired in 1985.  but because he was not coming to LEF none of us were interested to give a party to him. My husband as usual went to mid week prayer meeting  without giving a least importance to his retirement.  My dad was alone and alone !! He asked us to come to photo studio to have a photo of family on that last day, but my husband did not turn up.  and that last photo was  sans my husband whom my dad considered as his beloved son, and only son.

Dad was so very sad.  I too made him suffer with my looks, my pride, my self-righteousness, my religion, my association with LEF made to look down at him.
Dad loved me more than any one, he was so considerate of me, any thing he brought he used to say’ first Leela, let her choose for herself first”   He used to call me and wanted to talk to me now and then, in those days we did not have phones, so he used to call me on the phone of neighbour, when I got phone I used to shiver , and I used to run to the phone at once, and when I heard his voice, then I would say, with relief” humm, its you nanna garu, thank God!!  why I was shivering so much because I was so afraid, whether I would hear an evil news that my dad met an accident and died, or he got terrible illhealth and joined hospital again etc. Because we were brainwashed that those who leave lef will meet  accidents and die.  Once my brother in law had a fall on road on new scooter, because he was new to ride the scooter. But we were told out right, because he is with your dad all ways he met this accident, because he is helpinng your dad to get his bag this happend. .  My younger sister was a premature baby, she used to be very weak in childhood, I used to spend hours together at her bed in kakindad whenver she fell asick, not knowing what to do, I used to give her my company while she was struggle to breath.   So her first baby boy while in delivary died , soon after this the lef started to blame her and her husband and me for keeping her in the same apartment built  for three of us. as three floors.  So immediatly in fear like Lot from Sodom and Gomarrah left the house then and there for rented house leaving all those rooms empty. My two sisters were in Vizag but they were not allowed to stay with my dad in the same building though there were three floors seperately for each one of us.
  Once they ordered me to leave the job then and there. After the deat of my husband they started to oppress me to sell my home only home, telling me” you cannot maintain this big house so better you sell it to us and go away to an apartment” I once casually talked to man who came to my home ,saying after the demise of my husband I found no interest in anything and it became very difficult to stay in the house.  Instead of giving me a support or encouragement that I should be brave enough to do so he went and reported to the person who usurped me from LEF administration and he happilily wanted to get rid of me from the near by premises and started to push eaders to bring pressure on me to sell. When  I rejected he managed to build a Baptistry opposite to my back gate through which we made a way to enter into the center all those years.
Thee are the people who try to devour the houses of the widows seeing their plight and weakness.   They told me that it is not good for me to have gold , and better I give them away to the ministry. they indirectly instructed me better i should go in pale colors to college. They told me that my children should not study computers and threatend me that those who study computers will get strange diseases. Also told me to sell th sccoter which was bought by husband just a few months back , because none of us should use it other wise we will meeet accidents..So I sold it. I oobeyed them literally in all these matters.  They said I should not have a car, never .  so I sold the 5 day new brand car. for 50000 less cost for which I bought.
But one Day God talked to me surprisingly, and to the point, that I have another work and another field to serve Him.. ( will be continued in next episode)

Show More

LeelaMalaka

Hello All! I am a retired Lecturer, Former Air Hostesses, and a writer. I love to share MY STORIES, WITH MY GOD.
Close