Jayden, you are my life, my joy, my very essence of the existence.The way you show your feelings, the way you express your emotions, the way you show your love and affection, and even gratitude is just amazing. You know how to be polite and how to bear the hurts, aches and pains of life with a smile, you have tremendous patience which is so visible at every step of your little life. You are only 1.3 years old and not even able to have one word in your vocobulary except the word Ammamma, but yet how lovely are the ways you relate to the people. God has given me the most beautiful long hours of staying with you during these 5 months stay over here.
I thought I was all alone back at my home. I was thinking “poor me , I am eating alone, Poor me, I am sleeping alone in my room, Poor me I am seeing the Tv all alone but after I come here, 8/24 hours you are with me, and you make my life beautiful, and filled it with rainbow colors. Every morning you come into my room, and as soon as you saw me you give the most beautiful smile and with open arms you would come hug me, and quiety sit in my lap and take my hand and keep it on the key board of my lap top. you are my Edelweiss, kanna.You are so pure and bright, you are so small and white.. and innocent.
Every morning you greet me
Small and white,
clean and bright
You look happy to meet me.
Blossom of snow
may you bloom and grow,
Bloom and grow forever.
Bless my homeland forever.
You need that sweet song” Chirakala snehithuda” every day, every morning and every afternoon, and every evening you listen to it twice each time, then happily eiether you go to sleep or go and play with your toys..The way you hold my hand and push it toward the key board is amazing. Some times when I am in another room you will go stright to my room and climb the bed and call me from there. with sweet unkown language.
You are not at peace until and unless you listen to that song.
The other day you mom left you in hurry and closed the basement door on your face without proper ” ba bas” (BYE BYES) you started to cry aloud, I did not know what to do.. I tried my level best to console you but you never was like that , you were wailing louder and louder , I was at bay’s end, really could not imagine what would make you stop crying. I myself was so tired that day, my voice was half broken, and with a grunt voice I started to sing the song” Chirakala snehithuday” Immediatly soon after I started the song, to the very fist line of the song, you stopped to cry… your face was all red and eyes and cheeks were with fresh tears , but you stopped to cry..
Budda, ( OLD MAN) I call you Budda all the time, you know, yes Budda I am learning many Life lessons from you. one of the lessons is , when you are upset listen to a song where Jesus is our friend, yes, that is what you did know?? great Budda.. Chinni Budda, chinni chinni budda…lol
The other day I wanted to test you to know whether you would like even other songs or only this song, I played one movie song, immediately you started to slide down from my lap and tried to go away from me. Wow , how do you know that song is different from this. hhuh??
My, the way you move your whole body and the gestures you do and the way you nod your head and the way you clap your hands while listening the song.. how can I describe. hey I am very poor poor to describe your vinyaasaalu( Telugu word for climactic subtle movements of body for expression of emotions)
When you hungry you are so cool guy, you never make any fuss, over food, you just open your mouth and eat and when you are done you just nod your head to left to right saying “NO” for any more.
Now a days you learn to drink water in between your meals, so you turn back ward and show the glass , when I ask ” You want water, ” You just smile. … wow You are a great expressionist… haha is such word is in English language?, I think I invented it for you? Atleast I never used it in my 55 years of English speaking years.. hahah
This the first time I used it on you. I do not know what more new things and talents you would bring in me in this short period of time that you and me going to spend together.
when I fed you and when I give you hot bath, and wipe you and give you nice fresh clothes, you would give me so many kisses without me asking for them, and show your gratitude to me as if I have done great thing for you. Verily verily I say unto you Budda, even my own children that is Your great mom or your uncle john never never expressed such gratitude to em ever ever in their lives , esp at this tender age.. like you.I bet. haha
when your mom and dad come from their many outings, on different errands, you want to go upstairs to meet them. But as you are so grateful to me you just cannot leave me abruptly and go to them. So you say ” ba ba ba ” a number times for every step you climb to reach them, and at the curve of the steps you would sit still there, and keep on saying “ba ba ba” at least 25 or 30 times, you know I am telling you the truth, only truth , nothing but the truth, you literally say bab ba ba for so many times and ultimately when the time comes to you climb even that curve of the steps and again you push your head only towards the curve and again you say ‘ba ba ” and then you will disappear.
What a great buddy yaar!!
You do not have one single word, but what is the language, who needs it, huh? when one’s heart is full of feelings, words are not needed kanna…!1 language is known to people who do not have feelings, they speak one thing and feel another thing, people cheat others with theri many words, language has become a tool of deciet in the hands of hooligans.
What is in the language, when you know how to express your feelings, Why the language when it is disguised in white robes with an ugly Halloween face? Why language when you do not mean what you say? Why the language when you use it only to hurt others?
You proved the truth of the life, Golda.!. its the feelings, its the pure and white feelings all that matter. Even If you cannot express, does not matter, your silent presence and sweet smiles gives the fragrance of million roses in one place.. wow .. that is YOU my Golda..
I think when I see you again you will learn many many words, but I am going to take you just as you are now in my remembrances.. I will cherish you and keep this sweet companionship forever and ever in my life till my last breath.
How much love to share everything with others, especially with your akka, oh she calls you ” brother” lovely, and you respond to her when she calls you so.
I feel that there is an angel all ways with you. So I ask every day, to know where is the angel. and you smile and show different places.. so I wanted to test you again. Therefore I asked you many times where is mom or dad or akka but you never responded to my query of that sort. Only when I ask you ” where is angel ? You smile and show your finger pointing to a specific place or direction. Then i know that for sure that what Jesus said about you little children,.. He said..” The angels of these children all ways look into the face of my Father” ummm what a childhood. what a blessed life is yours Golda..
I once called you my ” Sweetheart” immediately your akka objected it, and said” ammamma you call me sweetheart know/?” yes i said, you are the sweetheart no.1 and jayden is sweetheart no.2 hahahlll Life is good and beautiful with you children..!! God bless you! you have made my life worth living here. God bless you!! ammamma