Attitudes and Feelings

Forgive and forget



I saw the little baby  scribbling on the slate,  an untiresome  process for those little hands of hers.  Scribble, scribble; erase,erase… I visualized my thoughts on the screen of my mind’s eye. There they are, “What did she say? how she mocked, how she try to manipulate, how badly she hurts me with those sharp sword like words of hers?”—There is a way to get rid of those thoughts, just erase them from my mind.. but certainly my hands get dirt in doing so, just like the hands of that little girl there.  Yes, they can be washed off, with water..!! My Living water of Christ can wash my hands if only I can go to Him.  What a relief!

Forgiving the enemies, Loving the neighbour, certain times  just skip out of mind, I see myself too selfish, as a process of learning not to be controlled unscrupulously in moment of my weakness.— I was enjoying a cup of ice cream, sitting and waiting for our folks to join me from Sea Life museum, there were two little children sitting on another seat with their mother. I had an extra cup with me, which I kept for the little children and my son to join me in a few minutes. I felt bad eating like that keeping those little children so near, and also having an extra cup with me. I suppressed the inner voice of sharing it with them, though I felt little awkward about myself.  Then came my friend’s family and my son,  it so happened, the boy did not like to eat because it is with nuts, he said ‘I am allergic to the nuts’ so the little girl tried to share the one already opened,.Again giving a deaf ear to my inner feelings of giving away to the little ones beside me, I got up with these  children of my friend. When we were about to leave the premises, John suddenly said,’ We will give the other cup to the little children behind, but as my mind  already corroded with ‘not-to-share’ feeling; I simply rejected the idea and walked out, though felt a little bad inside, but trying to think, that cup belongs to the  children with us and I would give it to them or we will keep it in the fridge for tomorrow, after all John paid for it.’– With these and many other traffic of thoughts, I came home, I told John to keep it in the fridge from my bed room; but I heard him asking the room mate, ” You like to eat ice cream?” — I think he gave it to him. Before retiring to sleep  the conversation about ice cream again popped up somehow, he said, again “We should had given the extra cup to those girls at the aquarium.” And added they were free cups.”  –I said, “ayyo we should had given, I thought you bought them in the stall of aquarium.”  He immediately quipped, ‘Everything you intertwine with money”  That remark stung in my heart.. but kept quiet, not knowing how to meaningfully analyse my own thoughts; as it was the time to go to sleep or may be I felt ashamed of my “not-sharing-attitude” —–Life is always with many ‘ifs’ and ‘buts; If only I listened to John and gave away that cup to those little children back there, I would not have to write this write-up now, questing, questioning, and feeling of despondence this morning.  Can I erase that part of” My Selfishness” from my slate of the heart? Hands becoming dirty, Let me go to My Living Water now.—

The question of ‘Forgiveness” sometimes swallows my pride of the heart. I want to forgive certain people who rudely encroached into my life, who dishonourably demand my attention, who cunningly try to manipulate my feelings, who despicably ruined all that I had built in my life. My husband did not die of heart attack, he died of the broken heart. All that we sacrificially toiled was misinterpreted, mismanaged, and mortified by a bunch of sly and sneaky hooligans, the wolves in sheep skin.  Usually people put a warning board at their doors, “Beware of the dogs” –warning the intruders about the fierce dogs inside the home; but Yeshua  warned us,”Beware of men”              Mathew 10:17a)

The world teaches the morals to us, telling us “Love is God” Love everyone” –But Yeshua taught us God is Love”(1 John 4:8)”Any one who does not love , does not know God, for God is love” ; Love your neighbour as yourself” (Mark 12:31) — (Mathew 5:44-45) Lover your enemies” –(But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you’ That you may be the children of your Father which is in heaven; for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.”) “Do to others as you would have them to do to you” (Luke 6:31) “give away your cloth to the one who grab it from you,(Mathew 5:40) “If you are sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat, too. if someone force you to go with them for a mile, go two miles”( Mathew 5:41) “but whosoever shall smite thee on they right cheek, turn to him the other also.”(Mathew 5:39)-

What does it mean?  selah-  I am sitting in His presence and reflecting on His Golden Rules of life. What does it mean by Paul, saying ,” Be ye self respected” 1 Cor 16:13 …quit you like men, be strong. act like men ; be courageous! acquit yourself like men ;

He said to them, “ But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you do not have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.” The disciples said, :See, Lord, here are two swords.” “ That’s enough” he replied. Luke 22:36-38

Does it mean the christian should be self defensive? careful enough to have a weapon to threaten the attacker? or use it to protect his own and other’s life in self defense? Why he told them, about selling a cloak and buying a sword, and when they said, we have two swords, he ended the conversation abruptly saying, “ok ok its enough” Does it mean the two swords are enough or the conversation about swords is enough?– feeling that the disciples could not understand his figurative words about the sword?  When actually Peter tried to use the sword in the Gethsemane garden by striking the ear of the soldier with his sword, as self defense of himself and others with him, Jesus sharply rebuked him sayingPut your sword back in its place, Jesus said to him, “ for all who draw the sword will die by the sword.”———Christ would never told his disciples to fight back, or kill people and shed blood by using sword,  this phrase is expressive of the danger they would be exposed to, and they should be cautious of the circumstances there would be great violence, rage, and persecution around them.  ——-–‘Do you think I cannot call on my Father , and he at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels?” Matt 26: 53 –“Put your sword back in its place, ” Jesus said to him, ” for all who draw the sword will die by the sword.”  what more instruction we need about the weapons to use by a christian than this? Though He was well protected by the legions of angels  He did not use them for His protection, nor he allowed Peter or His disciples to protect Him from the soldiers. Nor he told his disciples to use the swords to us for self defense.  Shedding human blood in any case was not the instruction given by Him. Faith, Word, Prayer,Love– are the weapons to be used by a Christian,  under any circumstances the personality of a christian should be trusted in the OmniPotent God and     OmniPresent,Omnisient God, not in the worldly sense of protection . It does not mean that we go avaricious in our self demeanour, or impetuous in our daily life,  the word of God is like two edged sword, therefore should be cautious  all the times.

Forgiving the abusers,and the people despitefully use us,  should also be done in the light of the word of God. There are certain people who would manipulate us always, seeing us gentle and loving and forgiving, what shall we do in that case? There are many types of forgiveness. 1) Whenever you kneel down REMEMBER those who are your enemies and forgive them. 2) Forgive a brother seven times seventy. 3) Forgive others as we would like to be forgiven by God as in Lord’s prayer   4) Forgive and also love  5) Stop praying until you go and set right with him who is in enmity with you Math 5:23-24  “Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come .

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Hello All! I am a retired Lecturer, Former Air Hostesses, and a writer. I love to share MY STORIES, WITH MY GOD.