I knelt and praying, all others rushed to Tuck shop, where chacko bars were sold for lesser price by uncle Chakravarthy, Rtd. Revenue Officer. Once in a year we used to had had hearts'full ice creams, samosas. We used to save money for these wonderful days where we could pray , take rest, and spend time in His presence.\r\nBut that day somehow I did not feel to go to much loved Tuckshop, I was kneeling and praying, after awhile, I just sat there in a pensive mood; waiting the next Bible History session to be started.\r\nSuddenly I heard the voice of Br. Joe, calling me by my name. 'Sister.Leela'--I got up quickly and approached him who was standing on the dais as sual his hands resting on his waist, tall and strong in crisp white shirt.\r\nHe is much older to me 20+ for whom I had much regard and honour. He was a man of God. I met him first when I was 20 years old, and he 42 years old, jubilant , vibrant, zealous for God, winning the souls. My first meeting was strange, everyday for 10 days I used to go to the dais and ask him, to pray for me for a blessing. I met his sister, his mother at my confession table. Three were working together, it was in the year 1974 strange, meet , it was.\r\nWhen he called me thus in the May Retreat, 1979 still his concern for me did not decrease a bit. He treated me as his own daughter, how the days turned into weeks, months, years till 2000.. was a phase in the history of Lef, and my life . I cant escape LEF its my life for so many years from 1974 to 2004 and after for some more years. My life is intertwined with it , with its staff, with its evangelists, with its teachings.\r\nI write just as they took place in my life. I cannot hide anything, nor can I color anything, I cannot pretend that all was well with it, for surely it was not.\r\nfor certain period of times, the religion walked in silver slippers, and certain other times it walked in rags shamelessly. If I pretend all is well all the time, or say everything is dirt all the time I have to give an account not to you but to the Lord whom I serve.\r\nNever you think that I wrote these things only now. I wrote these things in a Telugu Magazine "AMMAVODI'"( in the lap of mother) all these things came in our mother toungue, I never was afraid then nor now. I posted these long ago in my blog... Now I share on FB , I do not know what I would do later with the guidance of the Lord, may be I publish a book? Hope to do so. Because the colors of the men and organization was changed from time to time. but the word of God was constant and His guidance was clear, His love is never changing, and He is the same yesterday , today and forever.\r\nI like people talk maturely, not immaturely, I found the members in our group who comment were well educated and highly principled, and children of God, so I present the dealings of God here , so that you would see the love of God for a retched one like me even, and thus get strengthen much more in gaining more faith.\r\nFaith could not be argued. It should not be. If we think we argue about Faith means, we are lesser human beings and should shiver in front of God.\r\nI believe these series would take me another 5 or 6 parts in coming days.\r\ncoming to the main thread of the first part of this episode, I reached him briskly and wished him. He was smiling and looking down at me who stood at the end of the dais, and said, ' "Sister, There is a Good Looking and God Fearing , drafts man working in Railways, you pray for your marriage with this chap"---I did not know what to say, but he turned the other way round before I opened my mouth to say anything as somebody approached him to speak.\r\nI was shocked, I was bewildered and I had no words to speak.\r\nOnly thing I could do was going into the presence of God and spread the thoughts at His beautiful feet. He is a friend who would listen to us anything and everything and He would not keep quiet without giving an answer to us. "What a friend we have in Jesus -all our sins and griefs to bear-what a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer" Often the human soul want to take chances, own intelligence, strength and support of others to solve things, to plan and to grab. Never it could take a minute before it could do go to Him first and foremost. Only if we could do that we will get His rout map to go in this life.\r\nso the first thing I did was just knelt at His feet and talk to Him about this most important decision in my life. Anything could be taken back, but not the marriage, once I came back from the job which was not for me, but marriage...?\r\nSo I prayed...I would like to put the lines from my red little journal book where I posted all my prayers, date wise, and hour wise certain times. How my Friend patiently bore with me and How lovingly he answered me sweetly and steadily into His will.\r\nI prayed, Lord, your servant said that ,'he is good looking and God fearing, is it true. I heard many people pretend that they are very godly and god fearing in front of thine servants, how to know whether that person is really god fearing.. ok tell me Lord do you also will tell me that this particular person is God fearing as your servant uttered? if so please tell me.\r\nNo sooner I prayed thus, and with many other words, the session started again, and\r\nI was writing the message given by Br.Joe sitting on the mat word by word and sentence by sentence... my pen slipped off , from my fingers for no reason, searching for it, I heard the Man of God was shouting at the pitch of his voice, "Yes the Lord confirmeth the word of His servant"----It jerked my whole being, I picked the pen and sit straight to look upinto the face of the man of God, cant remember what happend later, but I knew one thing that the Lord answered my prayer instantly , and I knew that this man is right one for me.\r\nBut I wanted to see this verse in the BIBLE... I should LOOK into the BOOK whatever God tells me it should be from His Word, the guidance cannot come from any thing else. Only His word is the rock on which my life should be built, storms may come and go, But His peace will be mine.\r\n25\/5\/1979 Fasted and prayed and recorded my prayer in that little red journal book. and I noted down the promise I heard that The Lord confirmeth the word of His servant.\r\nlater for many days, I searched for that particular promise in the Bible while fasting and praying... but in vain.-----read the prayers recorded and answers I got except the promise... in next episodes....!!!