I am doing many things and trying to do many things, Life at its autumn years feels to finish so many things , all those things which I could not find time in my Spring time. I am counting my years, wondering when I need to leave for the Heavenly Abode, when the trumpet is called , and when I would be going to see my lover of my soul in a given moment of call.
Yes I have been busy still stuck up with books and papers, Spiritual as well as Secular engrossed deeply in meditation filling the appetite of brain and soul. Robert Frost in his beautiful poem laments, ..”oh there are still promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep” Even the life may look like a deep woods of deep”
How I wish I could go far far away to the beauty of Nature to devour it, to contemplate in it, to enjoy it, to sit quietly to meditate, to express my thoughts on paper !! But this feeble body would not cooperate, I find unknown fears encompass me of the travelling which I used to cherish so much for all these previous years, even to meet a nearby friend it takes my toll, even to see my beloved kith and kin my feeble knees being given away, I feel the whole world outside is not trust worthy, unnatural, and fearful.
Oh what happened to those beautiful expeditions of my lonely wanderings to the back of my home into the mango woods, and beyond to the little pool where I used to sit alone and enjoy the sweet smells of little flowers blossomed unnoticed? where those little small red and black seeds Gururginjalu, a type of seeds which were funnily compared to the people who all ways point out to the flaws of others forgetting their very dark flaws in their own life. the adage goes like this “As the Guruginja forgets its own black colour underneath it and shows pride in it thick red on the top of it. so also some people just ignore the blunders they committed, forget the darkest past life they led, but takes pride in their present glowing red of life, They are keen to point at the dark patches of life in the other’s lives. I was sitting there while the beautiful morning and evening sun rays fall on me, while pretending that I was reading a class text book , away and away from the sounds of the kitchen or the rumbling noises of the daily routine around. My whole being was in the nature, the little frogs jumping hither and thither, the tall grass swaying and dancing with smiles to see me, made me madly in love with the nature.
I had other expeditions to far away a mango gardens along with my sweet close friend, she and me literally fulfilled the adage, of one mind and one soul, like eating in one plate and sleeping in one bed, Why we used to go forth and come back in the same bus from one terminus to another end, on the college days, after we were exhausted with travelling we both used to sit under a mango tree again with a big pool of water in front of us, while eating the co conut pieces which we used to take in a little steel box, What we were doing there? NO fear of fear, no worries of worries, no past haunting, no present bothering, no future threatening, Sweet teen age, 18 years old, life looks like a beautiful colourful rainbow, expectations are many but no way or plan to make them come true, joys are many only to express in louder giggles for no cause, enjoying every minute seeing people puzzled over our sweet friendship,
Her name is Radha, she was so loving and too faithful in our amity, she was so jealous of me if I spend a little more time with any other friend, any where, she and she alone should be my prime event day and light. We both did Telugu Literature and enjoyed every moment while we study the great classics of MahaBharatha, MahaBhagavatha and Ramayana, we both used to lingering in dreamy literary world, personifying every character in the books we studied to some one we met either on the bus, or on the street, or in the cinema theater, There was none to escape our sight, we both used to get the same thoughts and same funny ideas to giggle loudly making people to puzzle over Those were the most innocent days, harmless days, beautiful days, where the girls were protected by every one, never can imagine any harm would happen to us even in such lonely tours into the mango deep woods. Adventure was our aim. No boys No other friends, only we both. We used to go to the sea shore where the long stretches of the fields were filled with survi plantation, Even heat of the summer or cold of the winter never bothered us. A holiday to college, or sometimes dumping the classes after the literary classes is all that matter, jumping into a bus and travelling to the far far places was all that matter, I do still remember how her name inspired me to write a poem on her resembling her to the ancient Epic heroin Radha for the college magazine. Among the white stretches of sea shore, we stroll side by side, laughing, taking photoes of each other, posing ourselves as some cine heroins photo in the magazines in front of us, .
Having a girl friend of one mind and one accord is wonderful, no demands, no obligations, in fact what were we talking whole day…I wonder, we used to go to Town Hall to study the literature, we used to exchange notes and do combined study, many a times, some times we both discuss a novel or a cinema and criticize the characters wondering why they have behaved in such and such manner.For every conversation there used to be a great roar of laughter. People never could understand why we both were laughing, The literature influence us both so much… and we enjoyed to study it of its every iota.
Actually I started this blog post here, today, to write any thing which comes in my mind, and which my fingers could type here. Suddenly Radha appeared at this early hours of the day, I still remember her face vintage, her small thin short figure, we were used to called by friends by our nick names resembling some cine heroin, she was very particular to dress of as Telugu girl, whereas me used to dress up as Hindi heroins, she was named as Chndhrakala, a Telugu heroin, me as Babitha Hindi heroin, both were having slender bodies, whereas me taller and more fashionable.
From 9:30 am to 7pm we both would not leave one another except for one hour, in college, she used to go to Music classes and me to Economics classes. In English hours I used to sit in front row, and in Telugu hours stick to the core.
She used to wait for me in the evenings while I finish my N C C classes, sometimes I bunk those classes because she used to become impatient. ..
So sad we both did not keep track with each other after my dad got transferred from Kakinada, to Vizag. I joined in Andhra University preferring Social work to Economics, she got married to a lecturer un Rajahmundry. Those were the days we did not have phones, (1973) and postal letters used to reach one another very lately.. I still remember what she wrote in one of the letters, she wrote about her husband’s name tallies to the Epic Hero ,Gopal,, she being Radha, she said it suits her very lovingly. she said in another letter she saved some money to buy pearls her long unfulfilled wish.
By that time I was serious about my studies, travelling to Kakinada alone to attend her wedding was out of question in those days. I had new friends, like Pamela, Mangavalli, Nirupama, and Andal, Now Andal and me became thick friends like Radha and me. it was again lasted after an year, she got married and left for Gujarath. Later I never had such close friends again. Having one mind and one soul is very rare…. .I never loved any other friend as I loved the company of Radha and Andal….Now after I got job,a dn then got married, there is no place for friendship, ..
.Wish I could have one friend like those two once again to chit chat and talk any thing under the sky. After all friendship is boon from God, only He can give such selfless, ever loving friends..Wish this could happen again in life once again ,my lonely expeditions into the serene beautiful nature, and having a sweet friendship with a girl friend again.