life

Life retirement

well as life goes on and on, I am tempted to think about my future as I never did before, it may be because of the coming summer holidays, and then my retirement date ahead, very soon. wow going to complete 58 years soon, and 34 years of service in this blessed college, Once upon a time I used to wait for the holidays, and used to spend them as busy as the bee, finding myself so tired and dis helved all together, instead of being refreshed, later after my nest is left empty, I found the holidays as an opportunity to visit relatives see the beautiful sites, and enjoy my youthful hobby of traveling, but now even one day holiday makes me shiver in heart, after completing the daily course like cleaning and washing and sweeping, ( these are the things i do myself now a days, as i need to give some mild exercise to my limbs and shoulders , u know..) i find the day is dragging still and i have nothing to do… except killing the minutes and hours all together.
Once upon a time i used to look at the day to use it fruitfully, and at the end of the day i used to review the day and count how blessfully or usefully i spent.
But now a days i look at the day and fear in the heart what i have to do the whole day, how to kill the time ahead.
i used to have friends who were much older to me , like Rehman, Swarnakamala, and Kanth aunty etc, but now as they are grown much older , their problems are far beyond my capacity, and friends like me who are alone or none, and the friends who are younger to me are busy with their families and relatives and festivals, and there is none to visit me or me to visit them…
Only my mom as dad used to do waiting for me, to see me , and exchange beauties fo life , but to see her also i have to travel 8 hours to and fro which makes me very tired unlike ester years, wow , life changes …for some years we are the architects of our lives, we plan and organize our lives and feel satisfaction when we achieve something which we cherish , and some years we just roll in , because the life we organized is so fixed and we have to be fit in all the time, to lead a life of contentment, then comes these years, nothing to do , nothing certain, nothing to achieve, ohh especially women in India, of my age, they are left alone and perish or look after the others needs, whether we have strength or not, we have to pose ourselves with full vigour and stamina, otherwise we are considered useless and a rag to be thrown out by the society..may be to the Old age home, well I am waiting to see what is hidden for me in the future, i wish some body who reads this give me some suggestions on how well i could use the days ahead, i have administrative abilities i think, so let me know how well i can make use of my future life or should i just sit in my home and spend my days … enjoying of eating and seeing tv and reading and praying etc??let me know, please comment and give suggestions…..

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LeelaMalaka

Hello All! I am a retired Lecturer, Former Air Hostesses, and a writer. I love to share MY STORIES, WITH MY GOD.

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