just my life

past & present

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 1, 2008

past & present

Life is going on very well, just cool, the only thing that thrills me is everyday having a new and good sari to wear and some new jewellery, lol, u think i am becoming materialistic?? who is not for that matter? but for me this is the only pleasure left out still .. if it is not there, i mean if i do not have any work to go out, i would not wear even good saris, and there would not be any more thrill in life.. haha, strange na/
once upon time i was not having any time to eat or to choose a sari for the day, whatever that was there in front , i used to wear it, and run and run to do other responsibilities, i did not have time to talk to others, i was waiting for holidays, to attend other pending works, i was thinking that i was doing so much of good work, like taking care of children , husband poor and needy etc along with educating my students, now all that is left to me is educating the students, in college, other than that no commitments, no friends, no responsiblities to attend so life is going on… i used to get up from the bed , just jumping out of it , fearing i could not attend all the work of that morning in time , but now i see the time and think ..hey one hour is enough to get ready and to go to college, even if i get up early there is no one to talk , nothing to attend, no urgent work to  finish, so i take lot of time to take hot water bath, to clean hair, and to take breakfast, and get ready to go to college.. ….later i developed to do some shopping which used to give some pleasure, but later i found that was only money spending , and i realized there is nothing profitable even in it.. so i stopped to go out to buy anything, so just going to college and coming home, no more outside Friends, no friends too in college expect now and then speaking to oen or the tor her heart to heart in college.. that is all in life.. for me .. only when i think of my little grand daughter i feel so happy inside, and i wish i could see her and play with her, i recollect those long walks to swing, and swimming pool and road side pastures and walks on meadows along with that little one in the last summer, and feel happy and sorry too as i cannot see her as often as i want to. oh why i am left so alone .. today while i am coming from college i felt a sting in my heart, oh i am going home and from now to the Monday morning i would be all alone.. no one to talk, but at the same time i do not feel like staying some more time in college to chit chat out to speak to others in the church, everything seems to be just futile, useless, no heart or mind in those conversations, just time killing… well let me see how many days i would be like this.. haha haha
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LeelaMalaka

Hello All! I am a retired Lecturer, Former Air Hostesses, and a writer. I love to share MY STORIES, WITH MY GOD.

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